And the award goes to . . .

So I'm at my desk today, and someone comes up to me and in a very quiet voice asks a question about the production of a book. Now the question was fairly straightforward, but what caught my attention was the manner in which he asked it. He kind of snuck up on me and in a real quiet voice asked his question - all stereotypical serial killer-like. This got me thinking, there are a bunch of people in my office that fit into what I’ll call the “modified high school superlative” category. You know what I'm talking about - you see it in your co-workers, your boss, the guy in the mailroom who listens to his walkman all day. People who make you stop and think, "I bet he/she would be a ____ if they weren't working here." Who knows, maybe they are. Anyways, here are the categories that I see in my office. Feel free to share your own.

Most Likely to . . .

Be a serial killer
Do soft-core porn on the side (long ponytail and all)
Have a bleeding ulcer (down to the requisite grimaces and guttural groans)
Throw their computer out the window - these people have a full on fight with their PC everyday. And lose.
Always look dressed up but never actually go anywhere - there's this guy who is really nice and everything, but on random days he'll wear a jacket and tie. He's not interviewing for jobs (not that I know of), but sits at his desk all day with this jacket and tie. I just don't get it.
Be sleeping with the majority of the office (this one I’ve heard exists everywhere - I've just never been in that half)

Which brings me to a side fart (hmmm . . . ) - do these "office relationships" really exist? I can only think of one co-worker I've ever been "involved" with and that was while in college. I know a lot of my co-workers joke around and flirt, but I can't think of one person who is dating or "involved" with a co-worker in my office. There are a few that definitely give off the "if you buy me a few drinks, I'll go home with you" vibe, but I've never encountered it firsthand. This may warrant investigation, strictly for the sake of knowledge.


That's all I have time for now - thanks for stopping by.