What could be better than Halloween followed by the 86th Annual World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party? Taking the day off on Friday, that's what. I'll be spending October 31 in the land of the witches, Salem, MA. What's up, witches? After watching the first episode of Season 2 of Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew, and seeing what a mess Rodney King has become due to alcohol abuse (not to mention the state of Steven Adler - oops, wrong Steven Adler), I've decided to lay off the drinking. For the next few days at least, or until I need advice on a Penn State game - whichever comes first.
On a side note, I refuse to be called out by this guy. That's right, The Mark, the gauntlet has been thrown. I may write this crappy blog, but at least I never slept with Lumbergh.
BONEHEAD OF THE WEEK
I usually don't stray away from football with this pick, but being in the NYC area, I have to point out Isiah Thomas, who was allegedly hospitalized this week after overdosing on prescription Lunesta. Well either Zeke or his 17-year old daughter. As the reports continue to come out, it seems police responded to a 911 call at the Thomas home, and an unidentified man was rushed to the hospital unconscious after taking more than the recommended dosage of sleeping medication. Howeve, Thomas denies it was him, insisting it was his 17-year-old daughter, Lauren, who required treatment.
My favorite quote from this fiasco? Police chief David Hall, who defended his officers saying, "We know the difference between a 47-year-old black male and a young black female." With the way that Thomas ran the Knicks last year, its a wonder that he knows the difference himself. Seriously, though. OD'ing on Lunesta isn't funny, and we wish Isiah/his daughter a speedy recovery.
On to the Picks
Western KY -16.5 North Texas
As if the 0-8 start could get any worse for the Mean Green, North Texas announced Tuesday that
15 of their 86 players had failed a drug test earlier this fall. I guess Denton, TX isn't just the Home of Happiness, but also of "street drugs." Street drugs? Who am I, my 8th grade guidance counselor? Regardless, the Hilltoppers are pretty bad in their own right, mustering just over 10 points per game against D-1 teams this year. I'm guessing that Western Kentucky will probably be able to score more than the 20 points they put up last week when they face the 119th ranked defense in the nation. I'm taking WKY and their ridiculous mascot to cover.
Florida -5.5 Georgia
Call it what you will, but there isn't a better game on Florida's schedule this season than the World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party. Last year's game featured a classy celebration by the Bullldogs after a Knowshon Moreno TD. I'm guessing neither team will need any extra motivation, since the winner of this game is likely taking the SEC East title and a shot at one of the major 2009 bowl games. Since I had no older siblings and I didn't go to a school with a football team, by default I followed the school my cousin Erin went to - the Gators during the days of the Ole Ball Coach and Danny Wuerffel, of whom Spurrier once said, "Danny is the best quarterback that has ever played college football." Who cares that Wuerffel didn't quite make it in the NFL? How many people can say they won an NCAA championship and a World League Championship?
I think this game comes down to the Lord. If Wuerffel, the son of a Lutheran chaplain, could lead Florida to two national championship games, just imagine what Tebow, the son of two Christian Missionaries can do! That and the Gator defense is holding opponents to under 12 points per game. But mostly the Lord. I'm taking the Gators to cover.
Virginia -1.5 Miami
Somehow, Virginia is 5-3 this season, yet they are being outscored on average by 4.5 points per game. What does that mean? Not much, besides that fact that I'm a stat head. That, and they really haven't had many close games (outside of their last two games, an OT win vs. NC State, and a 7 point upset of GA Tech). Lately, though, the Cavaliers seem to be making a run at the ACC Coastal title. In fact, senior RB Cedric Peerman has just come into his own, with 6 of his 7 TD's coming in his last four games. Two straight wins against two ranked opponents could set Virginia up for a letdown. However, Miami is one of the younger and more inexperienced ACC teams (two of their top WR's are true freshmen), and try as he might, the specter of last season's 48-0 beating at the hands of Virginia to close the Orange Bowl is hanging over coach Randy Shannon's head. I don't love the fact that Virginia is only favored by 1.5 at home (which likely means that Danny Sheridan knows something that I don't), but in this case I'm trusting my gut and taking the Cavaliers to cover.
USC -43 Washington
Poor Ty Willingham. I'm beginning to wonder if Notre Dame fans would even take him back at this point. A week after losing to the last team that employed him, the University of Washington announced that it was firing Ty Willingham . . . at the end of the season. I'm sure the Huskies are ready to go out and defend the honor of their coach against a USC team that dismantled Washington State by 69 points two weeks ago. Now the Trojans will see if they can do the same at home to arguably the worst BCS conference team in the nation (nothing is more awkward than three white guys flexing). Interesting stat - Washington is 0-29 since 2001 in games where they have scored fewer than 20 points (USC is giving up less than 9 points per game this season). The good news? This game isn't televised nationally. I'm taking USC to cover.
West VA -4.5 UConn
Sorry, I've been sleeping on the Big East all season. I just looked at the standings and realized that South Florida is the only ranked team (#24) and that two of the better teams in the conference (the Huskies and Pitt) have both lost to Rutgers. The only thing more disappointing than the Big Eas(y)t this season, is this Sunday night's match up between the Colts and the Patriots. I don't even think Tom Brady and his gangrenous leg will watch that game (you were prepared for a gross photo, right?). Getting back to the college game, the winner of this game (sadly) is almost guaranteed a BCS Bowl Game bid, which might just be one of the funniest/saddest things I've seen in a while. As for the game, I'll take West Virginia to cover the spread against UConn's Tyler "Don't Call Me the Hefty Lefty, We're Not Related" Lorenzen.
Until next week . . .
Monday, October 27, 2008
Week 9 Results
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
Week 9 results: 2-3
Season results: 23-21-1 (dangerously close to .500)
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
I will not pick against Penn State when drunk readers tell me not to.
Week 9 results: 2-3
Season results: 23-21-1 (dangerously close to .500)
Friday, October 24, 2008
Week 9 - Devil's Night!!!
Let me start off by saying that I got this message from a reader last night:
Reader: "Where's the blog?"
Me: "I'll post it tomorrow. Its like 11:30 and I have to go to bed."
Reader: "Bed?! It's Devil's Night!!"
Me: "Devil's Night?"
Reader: "Watch 'The Crow.'"
Me: "Aren't you somebody's husband? Don't you have to be responsible or something?"
Let me just say that A) I have seen the Crow, B) I know what Devil's Night is, and C) I'm pretty sure Devil's night is the NIGHT before Halloween, not the WEEK before Halloween. Thanks for the IM, though.
BONEHEAD OF THE WEEK:
Iowa OL James Ferentz who was suspended from the team for underage drinking. While this is bad enough, the coach of the team is also Ferentz' dad, Kirk Ferentz. According to a statement released by the team, Coach Ferentz said, "I was extremely disappointed to learn of James' very poor decision making on several levels. This offense will be treated seriously and his punishment will include immediate and total suspension from all team activities."
Ferentz also added that James will be grounded for three weeks and that he has lost his X-Box 360 privileges until he has "thought long and hard about what he did."
On to the Picks
VANDY -10.5 Duke
So I picked Vanderbilt earlier this season because they seemed like a solid sleeper team. And then they promptly fell asleep, losing two games in a row. However, despite losing 24-14, completing just 50% of his passes, and being picked off twice, Vandy coach Bobby Johnson said that new starting QB Mackenzi Adams "managed the game well and executed the game plan." Duke is not going to be as aggressive as Georgia was, unless there are strippers involved. Allegedly. I like the Commodores to cover the spread.
BYU -22.5 Unlv
I love it when teams from Vegas are involved in ridiculously large spreads against seemingly overrated teams. I'm not even doing research on this one. I'll take the Fighting Mormons to cover.
ARMY -1.5 La Tech
"Go Army, Beat LATech!" doesn't quite have the same ring to it as "Go Army, Beat Navy!" Either way, I don't see the Black Knights having much of a problem with this game; RB Collin Mooney has had three straight weeks of 170+ yards rushing, and the Bulldogs don't figure to hold him to under 100 yards. I'll take Army to cover the spread. It wouldn't be patriotic to do otherwise.
Penn State -2.5 THE OHIO STATE UNIVERSITY
By special request - even though I was planning on picking this one anyway.
Somehow, Penn State has managed to make it through a brutal non-conference schedule (Syracuse, Temple) and four games against the weaker half of Big Ten teams without a loss. Amazing. The Buckeyes on the other hand have one loss (to some team from California) and that loss came without College-Football-Fantasy-League-Stud Beanie Wells. Word out of Happy Valley is that Joe Pa is so excited for this game, he might even watch this one from the sidelines!!
On a side note, I remember when I used to go to the Old People's home with Hebrew School and we used to sing Hanukkah songs for the residents. Some of them just sat there, not really sure what was going on, but happy that there was so much excitement. You draw your own parallels.
Penn State has had a great season so far, but I'm not sure they've really been tested. The Buckeyes on the other hand have a healthy RB who should be the first one to really test the Penn State defense. This should be a really exciting game, but I think the Buck stops here. I'm taking THE OSU with the points.
Michigan State -3.5 MICHIGAN
Congrats to Michigan coach Rich Rodriguez. Ten months after the University of Michigan hired him as its football coach, he signed a contract with the school that runs through 2013. Unfortunately for Rodriguez, I don't think he came all the way from West Virginia to be 3.5 underdogs at home to Michigan State. This is a guy who was coaching the best team in an overrated conference last year. Now he's stuck coaching a mediocre team in an overrated conference. But hey, at least his contract was finalized! I'm going with Sparty to cover the spread.
Until next week . . .
Reader: "Where's the blog?"
Me: "I'll post it tomorrow. Its like 11:30 and I have to go to bed."
Reader: "Bed?! It's Devil's Night!!"
Me: "Devil's Night?"
Reader: "Watch 'The Crow.'"
Me: "Aren't you somebody's husband? Don't you have to be responsible or something?"
Let me just say that A) I have seen the Crow, B) I know what Devil's Night is, and C) I'm pretty sure Devil's night is the NIGHT before Halloween, not the WEEK before Halloween. Thanks for the IM, though.
BONEHEAD OF THE WEEK:
Iowa OL James Ferentz who was suspended from the team for underage drinking. While this is bad enough, the coach of the team is also Ferentz' dad, Kirk Ferentz. According to a statement released by the team, Coach Ferentz said, "I was extremely disappointed to learn of James' very poor decision making on several levels. This offense will be treated seriously and his punishment will include immediate and total suspension from all team activities."
Ferentz also added that James will be grounded for three weeks and that he has lost his X-Box 360 privileges until he has "thought long and hard about what he did."
On to the Picks
VANDY -10.5 Duke
So I picked Vanderbilt earlier this season because they seemed like a solid sleeper team. And then they promptly fell asleep, losing two games in a row. However, despite losing 24-14, completing just 50% of his passes, and being picked off twice, Vandy coach Bobby Johnson said that new starting QB Mackenzi Adams "managed the game well and executed the game plan." Duke is not going to be as aggressive as Georgia was, unless there are strippers involved. Allegedly. I like the Commodores to cover the spread.
BYU -22.5 Unlv
I love it when teams from Vegas are involved in ridiculously large spreads against seemingly overrated teams. I'm not even doing research on this one. I'll take the Fighting Mormons to cover.
ARMY -1.5 La Tech
"Go Army, Beat LATech!" doesn't quite have the same ring to it as "Go Army, Beat Navy!" Either way, I don't see the Black Knights having much of a problem with this game; RB Collin Mooney has had three straight weeks of 170+ yards rushing, and the Bulldogs don't figure to hold him to under 100 yards. I'll take Army to cover the spread. It wouldn't be patriotic to do otherwise.
Penn State -2.5 THE OHIO STATE UNIVERSITY
By special request - even though I was planning on picking this one anyway.
Somehow, Penn State has managed to make it through a brutal non-conference schedule (Syracuse, Temple) and four games against the weaker half of Big Ten teams without a loss. Amazing. The Buckeyes on the other hand have one loss (to some team from California) and that loss came without College-Football-Fantasy-League-Stud Beanie Wells. Word out of Happy Valley is that Joe Pa is so excited for this game, he might even watch this one from the sidelines!!
On a side note, I remember when I used to go to the Old People's home with Hebrew School and we used to sing Hanukkah songs for the residents. Some of them just sat there, not really sure what was going on, but happy that there was so much excitement. You draw your own parallels.
Penn State has had a great season so far, but I'm not sure they've really been tested. The Buckeyes on the other hand have a healthy RB who should be the first one to really test the Penn State defense. This should be a really exciting game, but I think the Buck stops here. I'm taking THE OSU with the points.
Michigan State -3.5 MICHIGAN
Congrats to Michigan coach Rich Rodriguez. Ten months after the University of Michigan hired him as its football coach, he signed a contract with the school that runs through 2013. Unfortunately for Rodriguez, I don't think he came all the way from West Virginia to be 3.5 underdogs at home to Michigan State. This is a guy who was coaching the best team in an overrated conference last year. Now he's stuck coaching a mediocre team in an overrated conference. But hey, at least his contract was finalized! I'm going with Sparty to cover the spread.
Until next week . . .
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Week 8 Results
Evidently I'm funny when I've been drinking, and I can almost make coherent football picks. Who knew? Thanks to Maryland for deciding this week was going to be their big win of the season.
Week 8: 2-3
Season: 21-18-1
Week 8: 2-3
Season: 21-18-1
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Week 8 . . . and humbled
So while I wasn't shut out last week, I did go 1-4, and the Red Sox are on the verge of watching the Tampa Bay Rays celebrate an American League Championship in Boston. Between this and the fact that I've been getting to work by 8am and leaving after 7pm everyday (including the weekend) for the last 2 weeks, I'm a bit on edge. Forgive me if this becomes incomprehensible by the end. I'm drinking. Heavily.
BONEHEAD OF THE WEEK
Narrowly beating out ND's Will Yeatman (suspended for the season after blowing a measly .02 at a house party - fine he's under age and has a prior DUI conviction) is Michigan's Mike Milano who was suspended after being investigated for an alleged assault on a Wolverines hockey player during the weekend. I'm not really that surprised that a walk-on running back got into a fight over the weekend, but I'm more surprised that a 5-foot-7, 193-pound walk-on running back took on a 5-11, 197 pound hockey player, and put him in the hospital. Seriously, Anaheim, you may want to re-think drafting Steve Kampfer if he's losing fights to a guy he is a solid 4 inches taller than.
The Sox just left men stranded for the second straight inning. We're in the top the third and I'm on my second beer. Glorious.
On to the picks.
Wake Forest -1 Maryland
Ugh, I can't stand the ACC.
Maryland fans irritate me. Guess what, no one cares about Ralph Friedgen anymore or if he must protect this houuuuuuuuuse. Case in point - the Terps were shut out by Virginia last week 31-0, and I know Maryland fans who keep pointing to the fact that they beat two ranked teams this season (numbers 20 and 23). Wake Forest features true Freshman Brandon "Teddy" Pendergrass. He is so smooth. See what I did there? I made a joke involving a running back with quick moves and an R&B singer. Oh, who cares? I'll take the Deacons to cover.
Sidebar: I just watched a commercial for the Bayville Scream Park featuring the Temple of Terror. Its a Halloween theme park on Long Island. The Temple of Terror on Long Island? I'll bet there are a few of those during the High Holy Days. Hey!!
Yup, this blog post is going to be a winner. I can feel it.
Bowling Green -9 Miami, OH
The Redhawks of Miami have one win - against Charleston Southern. Not Charleston. Not Southern. Charleston Southern. I'm not sure, but I think its an all-star team of sorts - like the EA Sports teams that play exhibition games before college basketball seasons. Bowling Green beat Pitt. Miami, OH is winless on the road. Bowling Green is winless at home. MAC Football - Catch the Excitement!! I'll take BGU to cover.
Sidebar 2: Evan Longoria just homered off of Dice-K. Seriously, he needs to drill one of these Rays in the ass to get them off the plate. Pedro wouldn't stand for this. Clemens wouldn't stand for this. This is the third homer Matsuzaka has given up tonight. [Note: for the sake of all things right and racially sensitive, I am restraining myself and will not make a WWII comment here. But I thought about it.] Come on, Dice-K - show some F**CKING SACK!!! Yes I'm on Beer 3. Keep it to yourself.
South Florida -24 Syracuse
The Bulls have had 2 weeks to prepare for Syracuse, the 105th ranked defense in the country. How will they deal with such a formidable opponent? QB Matt Grothe could throw left-handed, and I still think South Florida wins by 14. Sorry, B, the Orange are just outmatched. I'm going with the Bulls to cover.
Sidebar 3: Dice-K goes 4 innings and gives up 5 runs. In his first at-bat Varitek struck out with a runner on base, making him 0-11 in the ALCS, and he allowed Iwamura to steal third. Where's Manny when you need him? No, thank you Scott Boras. Enjoy your winter vacationing with Boston's money. I'm officially drunk. On the bright side, there's a "no-Dereks-with-mustache-clause." Bummer. Dude.
Kentucky -9 Arkansas
Neither of these teams stands out to me. Kentucky hung with #2 Alabama for 4 quarters before losing 17-14. The Wildcats are also outscoring opponents by 15+ points this year. On the other side of the coin, Arkansas' QB is named Casey Dick. Sorry, Kentucky, but when the QB of the other team is a Dick, you're not going to to win. I'll take the Razorbacks with the points.
Sidebar 4: Down by 5 runs, the Red Sox bring in the Pride of Hyde Park, MA (and my favorite reliever) Manny Delcarmen and his 22.50 ALCS ERA who promptly walks the first two men he sees. Not even Craig Sager's jacket could ruin this moment for me. And yes, Papelbon is on in the 7th inning. On a 1-0 pitch, he becomes the first pitcher to back B.J. Upton off the plate. Wonderful. This is followed by a successful double steal on Jason Varitek who is sporting Johnny Damon's arm tonight. I know I'm looking forward to three more years of .220 baseball from the Captain. By the way, it is now 7-0 on a 2 RBI double by Upton. Beer number 5, why not?
LSU -3 South Carolina
The Tigers were rolling this season until they ran into the buzz saw that is Florida and lost 51-21. So much for taking Tim Tebow out of the game, huh Frenchie? For South Carolina, Steve Spurrier's Smell(e)y pick is paying off - two straight wins and not just because of their offense. The Gamecocks have the #3 ranked defense in the country, and I really don't think LSU will have enough firepower to win this one on the road. I'm taking South Carolina with the points.
Sidebar 5: A leadoff double for Jed "Mike" Lowrie . . . and Varitek flies out to center. But along comes PAPI!!!! I'm out of beer - time to switch to Tequila! Ole!!
Until next week . . .
BONEHEAD OF THE WEEK
Narrowly beating out ND's Will Yeatman (suspended for the season after blowing a measly .02 at a house party - fine he's under age and has a prior DUI conviction) is Michigan's Mike Milano who was suspended after being investigated for an alleged assault on a Wolverines hockey player during the weekend. I'm not really that surprised that a walk-on running back got into a fight over the weekend, but I'm more surprised that a 5-foot-7, 193-pound walk-on running back took on a 5-11, 197 pound hockey player, and put him in the hospital. Seriously, Anaheim, you may want to re-think drafting Steve Kampfer if he's losing fights to a guy he is a solid 4 inches taller than.
The Sox just left men stranded for the second straight inning. We're in the top the third and I'm on my second beer. Glorious.
On to the picks.
Wake Forest -1 Maryland
Ugh, I can't stand the ACC.
Maryland fans irritate me. Guess what, no one cares about Ralph Friedgen anymore or if he must protect this houuuuuuuuuse. Case in point - the Terps were shut out by Virginia last week 31-0, and I know Maryland fans who keep pointing to the fact that they beat two ranked teams this season (numbers 20 and 23). Wake Forest features true Freshman Brandon "Teddy" Pendergrass. He is so smooth. See what I did there? I made a joke involving a running back with quick moves and an R&B singer. Oh, who cares? I'll take the Deacons to cover.
Sidebar: I just watched a commercial for the Bayville Scream Park featuring the Temple of Terror. Its a Halloween theme park on Long Island. The Temple of Terror on Long Island? I'll bet there are a few of those during the High Holy Days. Hey!!
Yup, this blog post is going to be a winner. I can feel it.
Bowling Green -9 Miami, OH
The Redhawks of Miami have one win - against Charleston Southern. Not Charleston. Not Southern. Charleston Southern. I'm not sure, but I think its an all-star team of sorts - like the EA Sports teams that play exhibition games before college basketball seasons. Bowling Green beat Pitt. Miami, OH is winless on the road. Bowling Green is winless at home. MAC Football - Catch the Excitement!! I'll take BGU to cover.
Sidebar 2: Evan Longoria just homered off of Dice-K. Seriously, he needs to drill one of these Rays in the ass to get them off the plate. Pedro wouldn't stand for this. Clemens wouldn't stand for this. This is the third homer Matsuzaka has given up tonight. [Note: for the sake of all things right and racially sensitive, I am restraining myself and will not make a WWII comment here. But I thought about it.] Come on, Dice-K - show some F**CKING SACK!!! Yes I'm on Beer 3. Keep it to yourself.
South Florida -24 Syracuse
The Bulls have had 2 weeks to prepare for Syracuse, the 105th ranked defense in the country. How will they deal with such a formidable opponent? QB Matt Grothe could throw left-handed, and I still think South Florida wins by 14. Sorry, B, the Orange are just outmatched. I'm going with the Bulls to cover.
Sidebar 3: Dice-K goes 4 innings and gives up 5 runs. In his first at-bat Varitek struck out with a runner on base, making him 0-11 in the ALCS, and he allowed Iwamura to steal third. Where's Manny when you need him? No, thank you Scott Boras. Enjoy your winter vacationing with Boston's money. I'm officially drunk. On the bright side, there's a "no-Dereks-with-mustache-clause." Bummer. Dude.
Kentucky -9 Arkansas
Neither of these teams stands out to me. Kentucky hung with #2 Alabama for 4 quarters before losing 17-14. The Wildcats are also outscoring opponents by 15+ points this year. On the other side of the coin, Arkansas' QB is named Casey Dick. Sorry, Kentucky, but when the QB of the other team is a Dick, you're not going to to win. I'll take the Razorbacks with the points.
Sidebar 4: Down by 5 runs, the Red Sox bring in the Pride of Hyde Park, MA (and my favorite reliever) Manny Delcarmen and his 22.50 ALCS ERA who promptly walks the first two men he sees. Not even Craig Sager's jacket could ruin this moment for me. And yes, Papelbon is on in the 7th inning. On a 1-0 pitch, he becomes the first pitcher to back B.J. Upton off the plate. Wonderful. This is followed by a successful double steal on Jason Varitek who is sporting Johnny Damon's arm tonight. I know I'm looking forward to three more years of .220 baseball from the Captain. By the way, it is now 7-0 on a 2 RBI double by Upton. Beer number 5, why not?
LSU -3 South Carolina
The Tigers were rolling this season until they ran into the buzz saw that is Florida and lost 51-21. So much for taking Tim Tebow out of the game, huh Frenchie? For South Carolina, Steve Spurrier's Smell(e)y pick is paying off - two straight wins and not just because of their offense. The Gamecocks have the #3 ranked defense in the country, and I really don't think LSU will have enough firepower to win this one on the road. I'm taking South Carolina with the points.
Sidebar 5: A leadoff double for Jed "Mike" Lowrie . . . and Varitek flies out to center. But along comes PAPI!!!! I'm out of beer - time to switch to Tequila! Ole!!
Until next week . . .
Monday, October 13, 2008
Week 7 Results
Well, my winning ways finally caught up to me. I went against better judgment on the Red River Shootout (Texas upset the Sooners and the Zambutos), Rutgers managed to surprise Cinci, Nebraska made a game of it against Texas Tech, and Lionel Ritchie was upset by Mississippi State.
My old friends Hawaii managed to cover against dreadful Louisiana Tech.
Week 7: 1-4
Season: 19-15-1
My old friends Hawaii managed to cover against dreadful Louisiana Tech.
Week 7: 1-4
Season: 19-15-1
Thursday, October 09, 2008
Week 7 - Happy New Year
Sorry this blog is going to be a short one. I've been a bit out of the loop this week with Yom Kippur and attempting to stay up late and follow one of the baseball teams that is still playing in September.
BONEHEAD OF THE WEEK
LSU lineman Ricky Jean-Francois. Ricky - first off, your last name is hyphenated, and both last names are French!! Not exactly a people that typically strike fear in the hearts of opponents. I think the last French person I was mildly afraid of was André the Giant. This week, Ricky publicly announced that he and the Tigers were going to "try our best to take [Tim Tebow] out of the game" this week against the Gators. I'm glad he's made this proclamation, and put a target on his back. I'm sure the Florida O-Line will have no extra motivation for knocking the pass rushers on their asses this week. Way to open yourself up to a few eye gouges and other street fighting maneuvers when you're making your way to the QB this week. Plus, at 6'3", 230lbs Tebow isn't exactly the smallest guy on the field. And he has the Lord on his side. Next time you decide to put a target on your back, Frenchy, stick to things you're good at. Like eating cheese, drinking wine and surrendering.
On to the picks
CINCINNATI -7.5 Rutgers
I'm sorry. This Rutgers team was almost as overhyped as this season of Project Runway. Both of which had huge expectations, and both of which have generally sucked. The Bearcats have one loss (in which they got doubled up) to Oklahoma, but otherwise have been plauing pretty good ball. The Scarlet Knights have one win (a 38-0 rout of MEAC powerhouse Morgan State) and four losses in which they've played . . . uninspired. QB Mike Teel, the hero of last season's squad, has thrown 7 interceptions and has gotten drilled more than a few times this year.
It isn't looking much better for Rutgers this week, or against UConn the next, or against Pitt the week after that. Frankly, this 7.5 point spread looks too good to pass up. I'll take Cincinnati to cover this week.
HAWAII -7.5 La Tech
Yes, this Hawaii team is very much not good. However, they did shock Fresno State in OT last week (well after midnight on the East Coast, so pretty much no one but degenerate gamblers saw it). LA Tech might be .500 this season, but they're still a Western Athletic Conference team from Louisiana, and even I know that Louisiana is not in the western United States. To make matters worse for the Bulldogs, Hawaii is riding on the arm of Inoke Funaki who has a proper Hawaii QB name. I'll take the Warriors to cover.
OU -6.5 Texas
I know better and there are people at the CDC who could unleash bubonic plague or cholera on me if I don't choose correctly. Key stats of the game: 244 ypg. That's what Texas' pass defense allows, ranking them 96th in the nation. 361 ypg. That's what OU's pass offense averages. The power of Sam Bradford compels you!! The power of Sam Bradford compels you!! I'll take the Sooners to cover.
Vandy -2.5 Mississippi State
I think I just like their mascot. Yeah, that must be it. I'll take Commomdores to cover the spread.
Texas Tech -20.5 Nebraska
The last time Nebraska visited Texas Tech, they were decimated by 60 (no, not a typo). The Red Raiders feature Graham Harrell and Michael Crabtree, the top QB-WR duo this side ofTom Brady Matt Cassel – Randy Moss. Huskers QB Joe Ganz could make a game of it, but if Nebraska couldn't stop Chase Daniel last week, their defense is not going to stop the Red Raiders' pass game in Lubbock. Late in the game, I see this one falling apart faster than a Wall Street rally. I originally thought Nebraska could make a game of it, but after losing to Mizzou last week 52-17, I thought better of it. I'll take Texas Tech giving the points.
Until next week . . .
BONEHEAD OF THE WEEK
LSU lineman Ricky Jean-Francois. Ricky - first off, your last name is hyphenated, and both last names are French!! Not exactly a people that typically strike fear in the hearts of opponents. I think the last French person I was mildly afraid of was André the Giant. This week, Ricky publicly announced that he and the Tigers were going to "try our best to take [Tim Tebow] out of the game" this week against the Gators. I'm glad he's made this proclamation, and put a target on his back. I'm sure the Florida O-Line will have no extra motivation for knocking the pass rushers on their asses this week. Way to open yourself up to a few eye gouges and other street fighting maneuvers when you're making your way to the QB this week. Plus, at 6'3", 230lbs Tebow isn't exactly the smallest guy on the field. And he has the Lord on his side. Next time you decide to put a target on your back, Frenchy, stick to things you're good at. Like eating cheese, drinking wine and surrendering.
On to the picks
CINCINNATI -7.5 Rutgers
I'm sorry. This Rutgers team was almost as overhyped as this season of Project Runway. Both of which had huge expectations, and both of which have generally sucked. The Bearcats have one loss (in which they got doubled up) to Oklahoma, but otherwise have been plauing pretty good ball. The Scarlet Knights have one win (a 38-0 rout of MEAC powerhouse Morgan State) and four losses in which they've played . . . uninspired. QB Mike Teel, the hero of last season's squad, has thrown 7 interceptions and has gotten drilled more than a few times this year.
It isn't looking much better for Rutgers this week, or against UConn the next, or against Pitt the week after that. Frankly, this 7.5 point spread looks too good to pass up. I'll take Cincinnati to cover this week.
HAWAII -7.5 La Tech
Yes, this Hawaii team is very much not good. However, they did shock Fresno State in OT last week (well after midnight on the East Coast, so pretty much no one but degenerate gamblers saw it). LA Tech might be .500 this season, but they're still a Western Athletic Conference team from Louisiana, and even I know that Louisiana is not in the western United States. To make matters worse for the Bulldogs, Hawaii is riding on the arm of Inoke Funaki who has a proper Hawaii QB name. I'll take the Warriors to cover.
OU -6.5 Texas
I know better and there are people at the CDC who could unleash bubonic plague or cholera on me if I don't choose correctly. Key stats of the game: 244 ypg. That's what Texas' pass defense allows, ranking them 96th in the nation. 361 ypg. That's what OU's pass offense averages. The power of Sam Bradford compels you!! The power of Sam Bradford compels you!! I'll take the Sooners to cover.
Vandy -2.5 Mississippi State
I think I just like their mascot. Yeah, that must be it. I'll take Commomdores to cover the spread.
Texas Tech -20.5 Nebraska
The last time Nebraska visited Texas Tech, they were decimated by 60 (no, not a typo). The Red Raiders feature Graham Harrell and Michael Crabtree, the top QB-WR duo this side of
Until next week . . .
Week 6 Results
Well done by me this week. I only missed the UTEP-So Miss game, successfully taking the stronger of the Universities of Louisiana.
Week 6: 4-1
Season: 18-11-1
Week 6: 4-1
Season: 18-11-1
Thursday, October 02, 2008
Week 6 Picks - A bridge to nowhere
I was watching the VP debate last night, and with some of those intelligent answers, Sarah Palin is reminding me of Will Ferrell in Old School when he has to debate James Carville. I half expected Gov. Palin to nearly pass out after some of her answers and start asking, "What happened? I blacked out." Regardless, Joe Biden thinks that Joe Biden did Joe Biden proud!
Bonehead of the Week - I'm going to blame the cafeteria staff at Georgetown for this one. The Cornell-Georgetown game for this weekend was canceled after a norovirus outbreak left over 170 students at Georgetown with nausea, stomach cramping and diarrhea. "Our job now is continue to treat the sick and most importantly, to prevent the spread of the illness," said Dr. James C. Welsh, assistant vice president for student health. "Hand-washing is going to be our mantra." Well I'm glad that it took an outbreak of the runs to get the Hoyas to wash their hands. At GW we always were taught to wash our hands after pooping and before we eat. I guess they forgot to teach that over at Georgetown. Then again, vomiting at Georgetown is nothing new.
On to the picks
AIR FORCE -5 Navy
This Air Force team is misleading. At 3-1, the Falcons look pretty good on paper. Last week's loss to Utah was very telling. Shea Smith completed just 7 of 13 passes and Utah gave up three second half TD's to let the Utes come from behind to win (plus, these days anything associated with Shea seems to fall apart in the end). Is Navy as good as Utah? No. However, Navy, who beat overrated Rutgers and then a solid Wake Forest team last week, features a run offense that might just be superior to Air Force's. Navy RB Eric Kettani has averaged 154 yards per game over those two wins, and I think he'll be able to keep Navy in the game long enough to make it a close one. I'll go with the Midshipmen getting the points.
Side note: Last night I learned that debate moderator Gwen Ifill broke her ankle prepping for last night's debate. Really? Were the answers to these questions on the tops of mountains? Did they involve jumping out of planes? How did that happen. This would have more interesting than hearing about John Maverick and Joe "call me Joe Biden" Biden all night.
Mizzou -10.5 NEBRASKA
Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Nebraska QB Joe Ganz is averaging just under 250 yards passing per game against mediocre teams.
Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel
The Huskers are 3-1 and have yet to play on the road.
Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel
Nebraska has won 15 home games in a row against the Tigers
Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel
I'll take Missouri giving 10.5.
SO. MISS -8 Utep
Fact: Utep went 0-3 before blowing out Central Florida 58-13 last week.
Fact: Southern Miss stayed in their game with Marshall for three quarters last week despite being penalized for 129 yards.
Fact: There is nothing interesting about this game.
I'll take the Golden Eagles to cover.
Let's just cut to the chase with the other two games:
Ohio State -1 WISCONSIN
Seriously? OSU is only favored by 1? This is too easy.
I'm going with the Buckeyes to cover.
UL Lafayette -2 UL MONROE
The exciting battle of the University of Louisianas!!
The Ragin' Cajuns take on the Warhawks!!
I'm not sure which one is which!!
However, UL Monroe has a WR named Zeek Zacharie. The only people I know named Zeek (or Zeke) had dysentery and died. For that reason I'll take UL Lafayette to cover.
Until next week . . .
Bonehead of the Week - I'm going to blame the cafeteria staff at Georgetown for this one. The Cornell-Georgetown game for this weekend was canceled after a norovirus outbreak left over 170 students at Georgetown with nausea, stomach cramping and diarrhea. "Our job now is continue to treat the sick and most importantly, to prevent the spread of the illness," said Dr. James C. Welsh, assistant vice president for student health. "Hand-washing is going to be our mantra." Well I'm glad that it took an outbreak of the runs to get the Hoyas to wash their hands. At GW we always were taught to wash our hands after pooping and before we eat. I guess they forgot to teach that over at Georgetown. Then again, vomiting at Georgetown is nothing new.
On to the picks
AIR FORCE -5 Navy
This Air Force team is misleading. At 3-1, the Falcons look pretty good on paper. Last week's loss to Utah was very telling. Shea Smith completed just 7 of 13 passes and Utah gave up three second half TD's to let the Utes come from behind to win (plus, these days anything associated with Shea seems to fall apart in the end). Is Navy as good as Utah? No. However, Navy, who beat overrated Rutgers and then a solid Wake Forest team last week, features a run offense that might just be superior to Air Force's. Navy RB Eric Kettani has averaged 154 yards per game over those two wins, and I think he'll be able to keep Navy in the game long enough to make it a close one. I'll go with the Midshipmen getting the points.
Side note: Last night I learned that debate moderator Gwen Ifill broke her ankle prepping for last night's debate. Really? Were the answers to these questions on the tops of mountains? Did they involve jumping out of planes? How did that happen. This would have more interesting than hearing about John Maverick and Joe "call me Joe Biden" Biden all night.
Mizzou -10.5 NEBRASKA
Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Nebraska QB Joe Ganz is averaging just under 250 yards passing per game against mediocre teams.
Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel
The Huskers are 3-1 and have yet to play on the road.
Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel
Nebraska has won 15 home games in a row against the Tigers
Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel Chase Daniel
I'll take Missouri giving 10.5.
SO. MISS -8 Utep
Fact: Utep went 0-3 before blowing out Central Florida 58-13 last week.
Fact: Southern Miss stayed in their game with Marshall for three quarters last week despite being penalized for 129 yards.
Fact: There is nothing interesting about this game.
I'll take the Golden Eagles to cover.
Let's just cut to the chase with the other two games:
Ohio State -1 WISCONSIN
Seriously? OSU is only favored by 1? This is too easy.
I'm going with the Buckeyes to cover.
UL Lafayette -2 UL MONROE
The exciting battle of the University of Louisianas!!
The Ragin' Cajuns take on the Warhawks!!
I'm not sure which one is which!!
However, UL Monroe has a WR named Zeek Zacharie. The only people I know named Zeek (or Zeke) had dysentery and died. For that reason I'll take UL Lafayette to cover.
Until next week . . .
Week 5 Results
With my first push of the year (Penn State and Illinois), I managed to go 2-2-1 last week. Kind of like kissing your sister. If you have a sister. Which I don't.
Last week: 2-2-1
This season: 14-10-1
Last week: 2-2-1
This season: 14-10-1
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