Bowl Games - The Most Wonderful Time of the Year . . .

. . . for degenerative gamblers.

Yes, I was wrong on the Heisman thing, but honestly - who really thought Tebow was going to lose it? I mean the poor guy carried his team on his back as a Sophomore and he has to spend New Year's prepping for Michigan. On second thought, Michigan has to spend New Years prepping for Michigan as well so it looks to be about even. Let's cut to the chase and get to the first installment of the bowl picks.

Poinsettia Bowl

Utah -8 Navy @ San Diego

Let's face it, this is basically a home game for the Middies, since SD is home to the largest Naval base on the West Coast. That, coupled with the fact that Utah has sold about half of their tickets means that the 8-4 Utes will not be playing on friendly turf. I know that Navy beat both Army and Notre Dame this year - two big rivalry games, but I'm looking forward to the debut of the first ever Polynesian head coach, Ken Niumatalolo. Between him and Navy's Hawaiian-born QB, Kaipo-Noa Kaheaku-Enhada, the headlines from this game have the potential to be the longest ever. I like Navy's chances in the Christmas Flower Bowl, and I'm taking them with the points.

New Orleans Bowl

Florida Atlantic -2.5 Memphis

Memphis is on a three game winning streak (and has won 5 out of their last 6) and FAU's biggest win of the year was against Big Ten doormat Minnesota . So why am I going with Florida Atlantic? Their campus is in Boca Raton, their coach is 73 and bears a striking resemblance to my girlfriend's grandfather, and their mascot is not the Owls, but the Burrowing Owl. I'm not sure what a Burrowing Owl is, but I think it can beat a paper Tiger. Plus if I buy basketball tickets through the FAU website, I get a free t-shirt! I'll take FAU to cover.

Papa Johns.com Bowl

Cincinnati -11 Southern Miss @ Birmingham, AL

Better ingredients, better pizza, Papa Johns! A coach-less team, over-hyped conferences, Papa Johns.com Bowl! Is there anyone really excited to watch the Bearcats (who beat three ranked teams) beat up on the Golden Eagles? This one isn't even fun to pick. Cincy should win this one on the arm of QB Ben Mauk alone, and the defense that held UConn to a field goal will have no trouble with RB Damion Fletcher and the not-So Miss offense. Not even Brett Farve is going to watch this one, and he's an alumni. I'll take the Bearcats to cover

New Mexico Bowl

New Mexico -3 Nevada

Seriously, Vegas? You're making a .500 team from the gambling capital of the world a three point underdog to an 8-4 home team? Thanks for the free tip. I'll take the Lobos to cover.

Las Vegas Bowl

BYU -6 UCLA

Speaking of Vegas, I'm a little confused by this one as well. Yes, BYU has been flirting with the Top 25 all season, but UCLA has come through in big games all year . . . wait, they lost to Notre Dame? Well they did beat Oregon (once Dennis Dixon left the game) and they beat this same BYU team by 10 back in September. Has BYU gotten 16 points better since then? I don't think so. I'm taking UCLA with the points in this game.

Hawaii Bowl

Boise State -10.5 E. Carolina

How will Ian Johnson top last year's post-game proposal to his cheerleader girlfriend? More importantly, will the Broncos break out the little-know "Annexation of Puerto Rico" play from the movie Little Giants? Boise State plays its second straight game in Hawaii after losing in the WAC title game to the Warriors. For East Carolina, they had a decent season winning 7 games, but losing a bad one late to Marshall (which all but doomed them to play in the Hawaii Bowl). The good news for them is that they get to go to Hawaii, which has to be warmer this time of year than the Carolinas. The bad news is that this game will come down to which team has the better Johnson - Ian or ECU's Chris. I'm going to go with the Broncos and Ian Johnson to cover the spread.

Motor City Bowl

Purdue -8.5 Central Michigan @ Detroit

Another sort-of home game this year. Central Michigan's campus is two and a half hours from Detroit by car (or bus) while it will take almost twice as long for the Boilermakers to drive from West Lafayette. With the budget of the Motor City Bowl, and Detroit's reputation, I'm thinking both teams might just drive there on game day. If that's the case, the Chippewas have the advantage since sitting in a car for 2.5 hours is better than 5 hours. I think the legs of the Purdue players will be cramped and they'll have to go to the bathroom after sitting in the car for that long. I'll go with the Chippewas getting the points. Plus I hear they have better snacks and movies to watch on the bus.

stay tuned for more picks after Christmas . . .

Week 13 Results

Week 13: 3-2
Season: 31-33-1


I'm still clinging to the hopes of going .500 on the season. With anything better than 3-1-1 record next week I'll be bowl eligible. Championship Week features some match ups which have major BCS implications. Then again, with 4 of the top ten teams losing last week, we could very well be headed for a West Virginia - Mizzou title game. Whoooo! Break out the Tivo for that one!

I'd also like to take this opportunity to apologize to Bill Callahan for being a clearvoyant. I guess Tom Osborne reads my blog after all.

Looking ahead to next week, we have the CUSA, MAC, ACC, SEC, and Big XII title games, along with Hawaii's quest to become the latest undefeated team not to play in a BCS bowl game. Couple that with #25 BYU likely not headed to the post season, and it looks like there might be a few non-BCS teams clamoring for bowl game exposure. Hmmm - now that sounds like something we don't see every year.

Week 13

Last Week - 3-2
This Season - 28-31-1

Happy Turkey Day!

Since I started a new job this week, and it is Thanksgiving, I'm serving up an abbreviated version of the picks this week. By the way, my apologies to the Ithaca Bombers who were trounced by the Purple Raiders last week, 42-18. Next up for Mount Union, Ewing, New Jersey's own College of New Jersey Lions! Try to contain your excitement.

Maurice Clarett nominee: Manch-vegas' own Jesse M.

No, he doesn't play college football, and since he's a "public figure" in the Granite State, I won't give his full name, but it rhymes with Artineau. In honor of Jesse's wedding tomorrow, he has won the award this week. Real smart, Jesse, one vagina for the rest of your life.

Seriously, I'm sorry I couldn't make it, but congrats to Jess and Kim on their wedding. I'm sure the two of you will be very happy, as long as the Red Sox keep winning. Kim, just know that in college Jesse had promised to name his first born after his favorite Red Sox if they ever won the World Series. I'm looking forward to meeting Oil Can Martineau someday.

On to the picks . . .

Home team in BOLD

Hawaii -3.5 Boise State

With a win, Hawaii can almost guarantee a spot in a BCS bowl game. While there is no chance that the Warriors will leapfrog the PAC 10 winner, Big XII winner, and/or LSU to make it to Nawlins, there is a shot that Colt Brennan can revive his Heisman hopes. Standing in his way are the Kings of the Trick Play (sorry OU fans, I know you're still crying after last week's upset - I told you so). The Broncos are 10-1 and are averaging 44+ points per game this year. Hawaii narrowly escaped an upset last week at Nevada, and is two wins away from doing what Boise State did last year. Lets just hope that the BCS computer has ESPN2. Otherwise, the winner of this game could be relegated to the Humanitarian Bowl. Yay, Idaho! Hawaii covers the spread in this shootout.

Colorado -4.5 Nebraska

I'm sure that Bill Callahan would like nothing more than to end his coaching career at Nebraska with a win over rival Colorado. What, Callahan hasn't been fired yet? Tom Osborne, what were you hired for? Pull the trigger already! The only person from Nebraska having a worse year than Callahan is Gerald Ford - and he's dead. I'm not sure that President Ford could do a worse job coaching the Huskers either. For Colorado, they're a win away from being bowl eligible one season after going 2-12. And they did it without the help of Colt Brennan, a female kicker, or strippers! See, Notre Dame, there's hope for you after all. Colorado covers the spread this week.


Oregon -2 UCLA

This game makes me nervous. I hate taking a shaky road favorite, but I can't believe that the Ducks will lose two straight weeks even without the arm/legs of Dennis Dixon. They're really making the best of the situation, too. "The national championship thing was fine while it lasted," Oregon coach Mike Bellotti said. "The reality is we're still always trying to get the conference championship and the very best bowl game (the Rose Bowl)." Sure coach - I'm sure the mood in the locker room after last week's loss was all (pardon the pun) Roses. Let's put this game in perspective. Oregon is still 9th in the country and UCLA lost to Notre Dame. That alone should seal it up for most people. However, Oregon and UCLA give up roughly the
same number of points per game, and without Dennis Dixon, I don't think Oregon has enough firepower to come out on top. I'm taking UCLA with the points.

Texas -5 Texas A&M

I got an email from Dennis Franchione saying that they have no way to stop Colt McCoy. I subscribe to his super-secret booster club newsletter. That's why I'm going with the Longhorns to cover the spread.

VA Tech -3.5 Virginia

Could this be the year that Al Groh beats the Hokies? Does either team have a chance against Matt Ryan and BC for the ACC title? Does anybody really care about ACC Football now that basketball season started? VA Tech showed that they can hang with the ACC Atlantic champion Eagles for 58 minutes. Virginia hasn't had the pleasure of facing BC yet. After last week's drubbing of Miami, I think the Cavaliers are still the team to beat, and they'll prove that they are every bit as hot as I say they are against the Hokies in Charlottesville this week. Or, they'll lose miserably and I'll be forced to find a new "best team in the East." I'm taking Virginia with the points. I hope.

Until next week . . .

Week 12 - Forgive and Forget?

This week, forgiveness seems to be the theme. A-Rod and the Yankees are talking again, Stephon Marbury returned to the Knicks, Ricky Williams was reinstated by the NFL, even LC and Heidi met to put the past behind them on the Hills. As I inch closer to .500 on the year, I'm hoping to be forgiven for some crappy picks I've made so far.

Maurice Clarett nominee of the week:

There were a couple vying for the (dis)honor this week. Coming in a close second was South Carolina for deciding to cancel their traditional mascot burn in preparation for the upcoming game against Clemson. As reported by ESPN.com, The Gamecocks announced Tuesday that the university will not hold its traditional "Tigerburn" pep rally before its football game with arch-rival Clemson because of a beach fire that killed seven of the schools' students last month. As a former mascot, I can say this is good news. Those costumes get plenty hot without adding a bonfire to the equation.

This week's winners are the University of Louisville and Duke who are in the middle of a lawsuit because Duke has opted out of a scheduled game this season as well as two more through 2009. The Blue Devils canceled the remaining games with the Cardinals and asked that Louisville make a "good faith effort" to find a suitable replacement. Hmmm - a suitable replacement for 1-9 Duke might be tough to find. I'm sure that Louisville's 40-3 ripping of Duke in 2002 had nothing to do with the Blue Devils opting out.

On to the picks . . .

Home team in BOLD

Notre Dame -5 Duke

Well, I figured I'd start my picks with a line that would have been 20 points higher two months ago. Besides their identical 1-9 records, both teams are coming off 41-24 losses, both teams are winless at home, and both teams game up 46 points to their common opponent, Navy. What do all of these stats mean? Not much. Both teams have abysmal offenses - ranked 116th (Duke) and 119th (ND) in total offense this season. The defenses haven't fared much better, allowing an average of 32.4 (ND) and 35 (Duke) points per game. From a pure numbers standpoint, these teams are evenly matched. However, Notre Dame is playing to keep what shred of pride they may have left. A winless season in South Bend might just be enough to make Touchdown Jesus relocate to Chestnut Hill (BC does have better Christians). Against my better judgment, I'm picking the Irish to cover the spread against Duke. If a bunch of Catholics can't beat a team of Devils, the apocalypse may be upon us.

Clemson -7.5 Boston College

From the worst in the ACC to two teams who are playing for a spot in the conference title game. With the winner of this game likely facing the winner of next week's Virginia-Virginia Tech match up, a lot is at stake here. Last year, players who went to the Orange Bowl got the following gift bag items: Orange Bowl beach hat, XM Satellite radio (with 4 month subscription), a watch, a beach towel, and a panoramic kickoff photo. On the other hand, the team that went to the Gator Bowl (ACC #3) got a commemorative ring, a pair of sunglasses, and a luggage set. I know its much easier to re-gift an XM radio to my brother than it is to convince him he wanted a new luggage set. For SWAG alone, you know this game will be intense. Well, that and Clemson hasn't beaten BC since 1958, they've lost the ACC Atlantic division title to the Eagles two years running (both times in OT), and Clemson QB Cullen Harper has invited himself to the Heisman discussion. This will be a real close game, and even if Clemson does manage to hand BC their third straight loss, I don't think it will happen during regulation. I'm taking the Eagles and the points this week.

Oregon -11 Arizona

Here's what we have learned this season. It is far better to be number three than it is to be number two. In 11 weeks this season, there have been six different number two teams in the country, with all of them dropping lower than #2 after being ranked there. This is Oregon's first week in the salutatorian spot, and with a national title game looming, you know the Ducks are starting to think about LSU and a trip to New Orleans. That could be bad news for a team that is facing one of the top passing games in the nation. Willie Tuitama of Arizona throws the ball a lot with 434 attempts yielding 3145 yards passing - good enough for ninth in the nation. Unfortunately for the Wildcats, they have been a little sloppy on defense, giving up 140+ yards rushing five times over the last seven games. With the number five ranked rushing offense coming into Tuscon, Arizona will more than have their hands full. However I am pretty confident that the Wildcat air attack will be able to match Dennis Dixon and the Ducks on the ground for most of the game. This one will be close for three quarters but as they have done all season (8-0-1 ATS), Oregon will put the game out of reach in the fourth. I'm going with the road favorite in this game and I'll take Oregon giving 11 to Arizona.

Oklahoma -9 Texas Tech

****SPOILER ALERT****
Sooner fans, you may want to scroll down to the next game.

Oklahoma has managed to rebound from a bad loss to Colorado to put themselves within reach of BCS title game hopes. Currently ranked number four in the nation, the Sooners could win out this season, face Kansas for the Big XII title game, and with some help from Georgia, Florida, or an unknown PAC-10 team, they could be heading to New Orleans to play for Bob Stoops' second National Championship. Things seem to be shaping up nicely for OU, well except for the fact that they have to travel to Lubbock this week to take on one of the nation's best passers, Graham Harrell (4878 yards, 43 TDs). Don't get me wrong, Oklahoma QB Sam Bradford (top rated passer in the nation) and WR Juaquin "Enrique" Iglesias are a very good scoring tandem, but Harrell and Freshman Michael Crabtree have hooked up for 20 TDs this season, more than any other QB-WR combo in the nation. The over-under for this game is 66, and with both teams averaging 40+ points per game, I think the over is a safe bet. Whichever QB's arm falls off first will probably be the loser, though I wouldn't put it past Red Raiders basketball coach Bob Knight to storm onto the field and duct tape Harrell's arm back onto his body. Sorry, Sooners, but this is your trap game. I'm bravely taking the Red Raiders with the points.

Ohio State -3 Michigan

Seriously? Who cares? In fact if there was a line for it, I'd be picking the D3 Mount Union Purple Raiders vs. Ithaca Bombers playoff game this weekend (I like the Purple Raiders giving 9.5).

Bowling Green -1 Buffalo

With a win against the Falcons this week, Buffalo would be a win away from a .500 season. Take a second to think that over. Go ahead, I'll wait . . . .

Okay? Good. That being the case, Buffalo has a very slight chance of playing in the postseason. The Falcons are that nice even team that wins the games the should win, and loses the games they should lose. This is a game that Bowling Green should win. Buffalo, while sporting wins over such MAC powerhouses as Temple, Akron, Ohio, and Toledo, doesn't really have a dominating offensive threat. If Bowling Green can neutralize RB James Starks (11 rushing TDs in 10 games), the Bulls will be forced to rely on QB Drew Willy and his Chad Pennington-esque 6.7 yards per attempt average. All that aside, Bowling Green doesn't do a great job of stopping the run, giving up an average of 224 yards rushing and 2 TDs on the ground per game. Those are NY Jets-like numbers, and we all know how well the Jets have done against decent running backs this season (see Portis, Clinton and Brown, Ronnie). Is this the year that Buffalo finally gains some respect and climbs out of the IA basement? I think it is. With Kent State waiting next week, I think the Bulls turn out a gutty win over Bowling Green and go on to be bowl-eligible for the first time ever. International Bowl, here we come! Who doesn't love Toronto in January? I'm taking Buffalo with the points in this one.


Until next week . . .

Week 11 Results

After two strong weeks, I'm creeping back into bowl contention. By this time next week, I could be back above .500 and heading to the Meineke Car Care Bowl!

Last Week: 4-1
Season: 25-29-1


Next week's big matchups include Kentucky-Georgia, the artists formerly known as Ohio State and Michigan, and 1-9 Duke taking on 1-9 Notre Dame . . . only on NBC!

Week 11 and we're swearing off all things Orange

What a week for college football. The Orange of Syracuse look to reclaim last place in the Big East from once mighty USF, Miami plays their last game in the Orange Bowl, and OJ Simpson finds himself in front of a judge to somehow explain how his stuff ended up in some guy's hotel room. Had enough Vitamin C yet? Good - let's get on with the column. Like Coach Belichick says, I had a good week last week, but we can always do better this week.

I'd like to nominate both Charlie Weis and Bill Callahan for the Maurice Clarett award this week, but their both too busy trying to figure out how not to lose their next game. Special kudos to Big Dan Jabowski for finally buying the rights to www.fireweis.com. I'm not convinced that "Big Dan Jabowski" isn't just an alias for Ty Willingham, but we'll see. I also couldn't pass up sending this video along. My condolences to all you Irish fans.


This week's nominee is actually from a story that developed on Friday of last week, but I couldn't pass on yet another ironic story this season. Tennessee RB LaMarcus Coker was suspended for the season last week after failing his fourth drug test. The University of Tennessee revamped its drug-testing policy earlier this year and in doing so, added a fourth strike for a positive marijuana test before an athlete was dismissed. I'm shocked by this whole story. Not so much the part that he failed four different tests, but that his drug of choice was marijuana. Seriously, with a name like Coker . . . I'm a little disappointed. Well, I'm sure he can always transfer to Miami.

On to the picks . . .

Home team in BOLD

#20 Boise State -24.5 Utah State

This game could get ugly in a hurry. The Boys from the Smurf Turf are 8-1 and yes, I know they haven't played any big name opponents, but a regular season finale against Hawaii could turn into one of the better games in college football this year. This week, though, the 8-1 Broncos travel to Romney Stadium (no, not named after Mitt) to take on the 0-9 Aggies of Utah State. Boise State RB Ian Johnson (the same guy who proposed to his cheerleader girlfriend in last year's Fiesta Bowl - remember that Sooner fans?) returned last week after missing 2 games with a bruised kidney, rushing for 2 TDs against SDSU. This week, he takes on a Utah State defense that has given up 204+ rushing yards per game and a whopping 102 first downs on the ground. The only upside to those numbers is that the Aggie pass defense is even worse. While this season has been full of upsets and underdogs pulling out overtime victories, I think the Broncos will have no trouble covering the spread here even if Ian Johnson sits for the second half.

Iowa -13.5 Minnesota

"For a guy who has little to no love for the Big Ten, you sure pick a lot of their games, Lee."
Hey, unless you want me to write about this week's Kent State/Northern Illinois game, you'll keep your mouth shut. There some question about the outcome of this week's game. Iowa has won two straight to pull even on the season, but both of those games were come-from-behind wins. Minnesota on the other hand . . . well they just plain suck. But do they suck 13.5 points worth? Let's look at this game from a pure Vegas standpoint for a second. Iowa is 16-6 ATS (against the spread) in the month of November, they are 6-4 against the spread this season, and the Hawkeyes are 7-0 against the spread versus Minnesota since 1992. As for Minnesota? They'll probably go winless in the Big 10 and finish the season 1-11. At least they have Adrian Peterson to cheer about. I'm taking Iowa giving 2 TDs to the Golden Gophers.

Kentucky -4 Vanderbilt

Kentucky has been all over the place this season, and there's nothing I like picking more than teams with erratic records this year. The Wildcats started out 5-0 before losing to South Carolina, then followed that up with an upset of then #2 LSU, and followed that up with two straight losses. The one constant for Kentucky has been the play of QB Andre' Woodson, who has 28 TDs on the year - more than any of the "B" quarterbacks (Brennan, Brohm, Boeckman, and Bradford). However, Woodson is faced with the task of forgetting his last game, a 3 INT debacle against Mississippi State during Homecoming week. I'm sure he wasn't crowned King of the Prom after laying that goose egg. For Vanderbilt, their task this week gets even harder when the have to prepare to stop Woodson's air attack and the running game of Rafael Little, who returns after missing three weeks to a thigh injury. I haven't seen a the Commodores in such a tight spot since Lionel Richie decided to embark on a solo career. I'm taking Kentucky giving 4 points this week.

UNLV -2.5 San Diego State

UNLV has lost five straight. Yeah, I don't know how they're favored either. I'm looking for something positive to write about the Rebels, but all I can come up with is their QB is the second best guy named Dixon at his position west of the Mississippi. When that's the best I can do, you know the home team is in trouble. I'm taking the Aztecs and the points this week.

Miami -3.5 UVA

Sniff, sniff. Miami says goodbye to their home digs after years of great memories. Doug Flutie connecting on a Hail Mary pass to beat them in '84, Penn State's 79-yard TD pass to win in 1999, and a bench clearing brawl against FIU last year, man, the Canes sure are going to miss this place. Lucky for them, they get to close out their tenure at the Orange Bowl against the hottest team in the ACC, Virginia. The Cavaliers have won five games this season by 2 or fewer points, and have put together a 7-1 record in their last eight games. Luckily for Miami, Virginia has been winning these games despite their anemic offense, currently ranked 101st in I-A. I'm sure all of the big alumni will turn out for the Hurricanes this week - Brock Berlin, Lex Luger, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson to name a few. Even if Virginia's offense doesn't put up huge numbers, I'm sure that the Cavalier defense will be able to hold Miami and either "nervous" Kirby Freeman or the injured Kyle Wright to a minimum of damage, well as long as the Canes defense manages to get off the field for a change. I'm taking Virginia getting 3.5 from QB University.

Until next week . . .

Week Ten Results

Thank you Notre Dame for confirming for us that your win against UCLA was in fact a fluke. After Navy's gutsy win for the Jesse Martineau trophy, the Irish are 0-5 at home. I have a better record at home, and I'm still looking for a job.

Week 10: 4-1
Season: 21-28-1

Look for some big games next week including 8-1 Boise State taking on 1-9 Utah State!

Week 10 - Recovering from Halloween

Happy November, everybody. I'm still feeling a bit sick from trick-or-treating this year. Maybe it was too much candy, maybe it was the stop at Andy Reid's house. I thought his kids were handing out bags of Pop Rocks. I guess they weren't. My bad. On a side note, thank you all for your kind words about the Red Sox and their win over "the best that the National League had to offer." Yes, Mets fans, we know your team was better, but in order for you to win in the playoffs, you must first make the playoffs. Also, a hearty congrats to the Yankees for finally getting rid of that sack of uselessness Donny Baseball. Now that the curse of Mattingly is over, you have no excuse when the Yankees don't win the World Series. Maybe you can just be like Scott Boras and blame the whole thing on Mariano Rivera. Well, at least you guys still have Power and Pinstripes.

This week's Maurice Clarett award goes to University of Washington RB J.R. Hasty. Hasty quit the Huskies' football team on Thursday of last week due to a lack of playing time. However, J.R. met with coach Ty Willingham on Monday and rejoined his team at practice this week. The coaching staff has been mum on most of the details surrounding the reinstatement, but the RB will be available to play tomorrow against Stanford. I guess we can chalk this one up to a (say it with me) Hasty decision on J.R.'s part. On to the picks.

Home team in BOLD

THE Ohio State University -15.5 Wisconsin

In the first game involving an unbeaten team this week, the Buckeyes take on a rejuvenated Wisconsin team, thanks in large part to RB P.J. Hill being able to run the ball. In the Badgers' two losses this season, Hill has been held to under 90 yards. In games when Hill has 100+ yards, Wisconsin is 5-0. Unfortunately for the Badgers, OSU has given up more than 100 yards rushing to an entire team only three times this season. Fortunately for the Badgers, one of those times was last week against Penn State. Reports out of Madison are that Hill will play despite a foot injury he suffered last week against Indiana. The bottom line is this - even with a healthy Hill, Wisconsin is going to have to do a lot better than they did against Penn State (38-7, L) if they want to have a chance against the Buckeyes and their 25.7 point margin of victory this season. Maybe coach Bret Bielemea should consider donning a sweater vest for this one. It seems to work for Jim Tressel. I'm taking the Buckeyes giving the points this week.

Notre Dame -3.5 Navy

I know I'm not the only one who has been waiting for this game. There must be 4300 Middies at the Naval Academy, plus another few hundred thousand graduates who have been waiting 43 years for the losing streak to end. I think they can stop waiting this week. We all know that Notre Dame is bad this year, but how good is Navy? They are a ho-hum 4-4 on the year, with a good win against Air Force but not much else. However, their offensive package is about as balanced as my checkbook. Let's just say I've been known to overdraw. The Midshipmen, specifically QB Kaipo-Noa Kaheaku-Enhada are a very run heavy team (averaging 343 yards on the ground per game). To say that the Irish are having trouble against the run this year would be like saying that the US is having trouble with insurgents in Iraq. Notre Dame has held an opponent to under 160 yards rushing only twice this year, winning only one of those two games. Considering that only 14% of Navy's scoring has come through the air this year, I'd say that Notre Dame should have their hands full. I'm taking Navy with the points.

Oregon -7 Arizona State

Yes, the game that everyone says they've been waiting for, but since it involves two West Coast teams, no one will watch. We know that Dennis Dixon has made quite a name for himself as a Heisman candidate, and the comparisons to Vince Young are accurate, but does anyone know the real Dennis Dixon? Like that he drives a green four-door sedan? Or that his friends call him droop? Did you know that, Lee Corso? How about the fact that Ducks' running back Jonathan Stweart hasn't updated his MySpace page? Are you one of his friends, Kirk Herbstreit? Tom is. Tom also thinks that the Sun Devils are no match for Oregon on the road. And since Tom has over 207 million friends on Facebook, I'm going to go with him and take the Ducks giving seven. Sorry, coach Erickson - there's only room for one Dennis to win this week, and it isn't you.

Kansas -16.5 Nebraska

Somehow I've managed to ignore the fact that Kansas has gone undefeated this season. I'm sorry Kansas, I really am. How could I overlook the beating you gave (2-6, I-AA) SE Louisiana (led by QB Brian "Babaian" Babin), or the spanking of (0-8) Florida International (who hasn't won a game since 2005), or even the home opener against MAC powerhouse Central Michigan. I'm sorry I haven't been paying closer attention to the Jayhawks with that difficult out of conference schedule. What was I thinking? Nebraska, on the other hand, has lost 4 straight games (2 to ranked opponents), is under .500 for the first time since 2004, and with QB Sam Keller out for the season, the Huskers are going to need a few "Lucky" games from their star running back Marion to get bowl eligible. I'm going to take the home favorite Jayhawks this week, just because Nebraska's starting QB has completed fewer passes in his college career (10) than interceptions the Kansas defense has forced over the last five weeks ( 11). I'm taking Kansas giving the points.


Arkansas State -17.5 Florida International

This could be the anti-Colts/Patriots game. As I mentioned above, FIU is awful. They are on a frigid 20 game losing streak, 4-44 when scoring fewer than 30 points since 2001 (Arkansas State is allowing just above 28 per game this season), and they have scored an astounding seven TDs in 8 games this year. Even Notre Dame isn't that bad. Arkansas State is no top 25 team either. In addition to their 3-5 record, QB Corey Leonard has a TD:INT ratio of 13:11, and they lost to Middle Tennessee State by 17 (after MTSU was scorched by Louisville for 58 points this year). The saving grace for FIU could be that despite QB Wayne Younger's passer rating of 38.89 last week, he did rush for 124 yards. Now if he could just work on his 5:15 TD:INT ratio, FIU might be in business. I'm going to take the home favorite Indians over the Golden Panthers.


Until next week . . .

Week 9 Results

Nothing makes a Big Ten game more exciting than hoping that Michigan will go for a 2 point conversion in the 4th quarter just to cover the spread. Instead I get a push bringing me to 2-2-1 on the week. By far, my best week in over a month, but much like UConn's "upset" of USF, when you look at it in the grand scheme of things, it really isn't that impressive.

Week 9: 2-2-1
Season: 17-27-1

At least the National Treasure (2-1 post season record) proved that he really is worth his $100 million contract. Say what you want about his shaky ALDS start, but Dice-K had more RBI in one at bat last night than A-Rod did in the entire 2007 post season. I'm just putting that out there. I watched Game 3 of the World Series at a sports bar in Foxwoods with a few buddies and Louis Tiant for a bachelor party. I'm not sure what was more surreal - watching El Tiante wander into the sports bar at Foxwoods handing out cigars, or my buddy walking over to him and asking for a picture while telling him that his Cuban sandwiches are delicious.

Week 9 - Now or never

After last week's debacle, maybe it isn't the plethora of upsets this season. Maybe its me. After all, I have no job, I'm still finishing my research project that I started in June, and now I'm 15-25 on the season. Things couldn't get much worse. At least I still have the Red Sox. In honor of the Olde Towne Team making it back to the Fall Classic (which yes, Dane Cook, we know there is only one of them), I'm picking 5 games this week with a New England-related theme. Plus I'll be throwing in my two cents when appropriate. Work with me here - I need more mojo to win games than Tony Pena does to get the Yankee managerial job.

Maurice Clarett nominee of the week:

Not necessarily a dumb arrest this week (since the person who did it hasn't been caught), but Florida State coach Bobby Bowden woke up on Sunday morning to find that someone had placed a large FOR SALE sign outside his home during the night. Bowden, whose Seminoles blew a fourth quarter lead to lose to in-state rival Miami, was good natured in his response to the incident, as reported by the South Florida Sun-Sentinel. I'm just wondering why more people didn't pick up on the joke sooner and had to ask coach Bowden to clarify whether he was moving or not. I mean, can you really sell an entire nursing home that easily?


On to the picks

Home team in BOLD

#8 Virginia Tech -3 #2 Boston College

The obvious connection here is the Boston one. Boston sports are great right now - the Patriots are undefeated, the Red Sox are in the World Series, the Bruins are a stunning 5-3 with the best goalie in all of hockey. Throw in the impending reign of the Celtics' new Big Three, and things seem to be on the up-and-up for fans in the Hub. However, the oddsmakers think otherwise. VA Tech, one of the best 1 loss teams in the country, doesn't know who will be starting at QB, the Eagles have one of the top signal callers in the country in Matt Ryan (17 TDs, 2100+ passing yards), and oh yeah, they're still undefeated. I know this is a home game for the Hokies, and BC lost in their last trip to Blacksburg, but unless one of the Vick brothers decides to come back and suit up this week, it doesn't look too promising for the Hokies' offense. I'm going with Boston College and the points against Virginia Tech.


#10 South Florida -5.5 #23 Connecticut

So everyone knows that UConn is in New England, but how many of you know that USF has two DB's that grew up minutes from the Red Sox' Spring Training home in Fort Meyers? Yeah, I didn't either until I looked at the roster. After watching the Bulls lose to Rutgers, I'm not sold on their ability to finish on top of the Big East by season's end. That being the case, the Huskies' only "quality" win was against an overrated Louisville squad, and despite what my cousin David (who is in his first semester in Storrs) says, QB Tyler "I'm not related to Jared" Lorenzen and UConn definitely won't finish the year a Top 25 team. In fact, they could lose four of their last five games (USF, Rutgers, WVA, Cincy) and I wouldn't be surprised. I think that trend starts this week. I'll take South Florida on the road giving 5.5 points to UConn.

By the way, Joe Buck just informed me that Colorado Rockies' starter Jeff Francis' favorite movie is Shawshank Redemption and his favorite food is "a good hamburger." I'm glad you specified that for us Jeff - they're aren't too many of us that prefer bad hamburgers. Maybe if you were concentrating less on hamburgers and more on pitch location, Kevin Youkilis wouldn't have scored from first on a David Ortiz double.

Tim McCarver added this piece of wisdom - "When the runner hits third base, the next stop is home." Thanks for letting us know you're there, Tim. Where would we be without you?

Michigan -24 Minnesota

The first two I get, but Michigan-Minnesota? Two Big Ten teams? How does this fit in with the theme? I'm so glad you asked. Not only did David Ortiz start his career in Minnesota, but the Golden Gophers have a RB named R.J. Buckner. A bit of a stretch, yes, but so are Minnesota's chances against Big Blue in Ann Arbor. Not even the Gopher with the best last name in college football, Logan U'u can save them this week. Well, maybe if he convinces his teammates to wear I-AA uniforms this week. That seems to intimidate Michigan fans. Michigan is playing for their 7th straight win, a meeting Ohio State next month for the Big Ten championship, and (gulp) a chance at a BCS game in January. Minnesota is playing for . . . well they're just playing. Poorly. I'm going to take the Wolverines giving 24 points this week. By the way, this game is airing live on ESPN Classic. The irony is not lost on me.

Just in case you were wondering, there may still be only one . . . Oc-TOE-ber. We're waiting on Dane Cook for confirmation.

#11 Florida -10 #18 Georgia

My cousin Erin, the biggest Gator fan I know, is having her 30th birthday party at the biggest outdoor cocktail party I know. Even she would agree that Tim Tebow is doing a good job making people forget about Chris Leak by racking up 17 TDs passing and another 10 rushing. With Tebow at the helm, Florida is averaging 40+ points a game. Despite their back-to-back losses to Auburn and then #1 LSU, Florida could win this week, beat South Carolina in two weeks, and face LSU for the SEC title. Tebow has been limited in practice this week with a sore shoulder, but as I just mentioned, he's run for 10 TDs this season. Even if he can't air out the long bombs, Tebow will find TE Cornelius Ingram, brother of Red Sox 1B Yukon Cornelius, (above) who has 21 receptions for 5 TDs. For Georgia, the key to this game is their defense. They're holding opponents to under 20 points this season, something that has happened to the Gators only once this year (in their loss to Auburn). I can't imagine that Georgia will be the second team to do it. Not even with Peabody, MA native (my hometown) Brad Arsenault on the Bulldogs defense. However, Florida is 4-9 against the spread in their last 13 road games. Florida giving 10 points seems a bit much, so I'll take Georgia getting 10 from the Gators.

In-Game Update: The Red Sox have batted around in the fifth, and 6 straight batters have reached against Rockies reliever Franklin Morales. I guess you could say Morales low right now for Colorado. Thank you, thank you, I'll be here all week.

#4 Arizona State -3 #12 California

I guess when you're 7-0, you get the benefit of the doubt in the BCS rankings and the computer can somehow justify a #4 spot to a team whose opponents are a combined 20-31. Dustin Pedroia's alma mater isn't as good (in my opinion at least) as their #7 AP ranking - in fact I don't even think they're the best team in the PAC-10. This weekend will clear up a lot of things, the least of which will be which of the 5-7-9 teams in the nation have the best shot at a conference title, and which will drop out of the top 10. the Sun Devils Safety Troy Nolan is tied for third in the nation with 5 INT's this year leads a defense that has allowed more than 3 TDs only once this season. They'll have their hands full with Cal who is Hell-bent on winning after two straight losses (including last week to the Bruins of UCLA) all but crushed their shot at a January bowl game this season. Look for QB Nate Longshore who threw 3 TDs against UCLA to come out gunning in Tempe. I like the Golden Bears getting 3 points on the road.

One final note, if you had told me last week that not only will Eric Gagne be added to the World Series roster, but that there is a very good shot that he will come on to pitch a perfect inning to close out Game One of the series I would have thought you were crazy. I guess that only goes to show that there is only one . . . Octooooooooober!

Results

1-4 on the week, including absolutely blowing the shutout of the Irish by USC. As Devin said, "You took Notre Dame with the points? You really are bad at this." No kidding.

Week 8 - I really need to start picking those Thursday night games

After watching last night's "stunner" in New Jersey, I realized two things: 1) The Big East teams love to screw with football fans because they all take turns beating each other. It was great watching a bar full of Rutgers fans celebrate the win last night until my buddy Cheeques casually reminded everyone that the win actually hurts the conference. 2) Regardless of how badly a team misses their expectations during the season, everyone gets excited when they win a game against a ranked team that they were actually supposed to beat. I dare you to find one person who at the beginning of the season who would have called Rutgers' win over USF an upset. Rutgers should have been much better than their 4-2 schedule suggested, and no one could have expected that USF would have been undefeated and #2 in the nation. My point is, records don't always accurately depict how good a team is. That puts my 14-21 record in perspective, doesn't it?

Maurice Clarett nominee:

I'm going to nominate the Ball State athletic program for their role in a textbook loan scandal that has rocked the MAC. The football team lost 3 scholarships and was placed on probation for two years because of unidentified athletes who obtained $26,944 in books for classes in which they weren't enrolled. According to ESPN.com reports, in some cases, the athletes obtained more than one copy of a book, which they gave to others. In even worse news for Ball State, the softball team was limited to only 18 hours of athletic-related activities per week, and tennis financial aid will be reduced by .04 of one scholarship during the 2008-09 year. What next, the clarinet players will have the number of reeds they can carry in their instrument cases reduced?

On to the picks - home team in BOLD

USC -20 Notre Dame

After enduring a scary charter flight to South Bend, the Trojans seem confident that both QB John David Booty and RB Stafon Johnson will start on Saturday. Brushing off the flight in which USC's plane had to abort their first landing attempt due to a thunderstorm and severe turbulence, Booty said, ""It wasn't the worst flight I've ever been on," thus cementing his status as "tough guy of the week." Unfortunately for the Trojans, they are catching the Irish at a peculiar time in the season. Notre Dame followed up their lone win of the season by holding BC to 13 points in the first half last week. Never one to make things simple, beleaguered coach Charlie Weis has decided that his 3rd string QB Evan Sharpley will get the start on Saturday. USC is still stinging from their 1 point loss to Stanford two weeks ago, and is looking to reclaim their spot atop the PAC-10 with UCLA and Arizona State both having must win games this week. However, this could be a potential trap game for the Trojans with Oregon looming on the horizon. I don't think that Sharpley can pull off the upset, but he will make this one close. I'll take Notre Dame with the points.

Purdue -7 Iowa

1-3 Iowa takes on 1-2 Purdue in the battle of who is the Big Ten's second worst team. Granted, either of them could still beat any Big East or ACC Team because they're both Big Ten teams. Suuuuuuuure. The Hawkeyes are holding opponents to an average of 15 points per game this season. Unfortunately, they're only managing to put up 16 points of offense per game. On the other side of the field, the Boilermakers have lost two straight after going 5-0 to start the season. I'm really not sure how this game will turn out, but since it involves two Big ten teams, it is destined to be a classic. I'll take Purdue to cover the spread.

Ohio pk Toledo

In a match up of two mediocre field generals, Toledo's QB Aaron Opelt has thrown 4 TDs and 6 INTs this season while being sacked 4 times. Ohio's QB Brad Bower has thrown 6 TDs and 6 INTs with 16 sacks. You'd think Toledo has the edge in this game except for the fact that they lost to Buffalo(?) by ten last week. Since its a pick-em game, I'll flip a coin and take Ohio to win.


-On a side note, I'm listening to the TV in the background while writing this blog, and I just heard a commercial for a Halloween store that allows you to put costumes on layaway. What happened to parents putting their kids in jeans and a plaid shirt, stuffing them full of straw, and sending them out to Trick-or-Treat as a scarecrow? I love Halloween just as much as the next person, but costumes on layaway? Seriously? Just cut a few holes in a sheet, throw it over your head, and be a ghost. On second thought, in some parts of the country, you could be confused as showing your opposition to the Jena 6.

Back to the picks . . .

LSU -10 Auburn

LSU comes into this game playing their 5th ranked opponent in seven weeks. They were well on their way to a #1 BCS ranking until they stumbled at Kentucky las week. After starting 1-2 this season, Auburn has turned it around and is making their case for an SEC championship as well. With both teams giving up an average of less than 16 points per game, I'm guessing this match up will be less like the 43-37 barn-burner LSU had last week, and more like the 9-7 stalemate Auburn eked out against Arkansas. One thing is still bugging me about this LSU team. As good as the Tigers' defense is, I can't put my finger on the reason that they put up so many points each week. Despite my hesitation to go with the Bayou Bengals, Auburn is only outscoring their opponents by 10 each game, and that type of offensive output won't be enough to stop the Tigers. I'll take LSU giving ten points in this one as they make their way back into the BCS Top 2.

Syracuse -4.5 Buffalo

Not to criticize the Orange too much, but why would you schedule your Homecoming for last week against Rutgers when you could have waited a week for you game against Buffalo? I know there is the whole "in-conference game" thing, but aren't you supposed to play a team you have a chance of beating during Homecoming? This week, Syracuse is somehow favored against the Bulls, who are not only coming off of two straight wins and are looking for their longest win streak in longer than I can remember, but with a win this week, they could be (dare I say it) bowl eligible. Buffalo looks to take advantage of a Syracuse run defense that allowed Rutgers' Ray Rice to reach a season high with 196 yards rushing and tie a career high 3 TDs. Though Bufallo doesn't have Ray Rice, they do have James Starks who is averaging 2+ scores and 130+ yards per game over his last four starts. Syracuse has . . . a big orange mascot. I'll go with Buffalo taking the points over Syracuse.

Until next week . . .

Week 7 Results

2-3 on the week and 14-21 on the season. I really need to turn it around soon. At this rate, I won't even be bowl eligible. I'd make some sort of Joe Torre/George Steinbrenner joke here, but I don't have a job either so it really isn't that funny.

Week 7 - Looking to make up some ground

Yuck. My goal of trying to gain ground last week was as successful as Chien-Ming Wang's ALDS performance. At least I don't have a boss anymore so there isn't a chance I'll get fired like Uncle Joe. I guess that's the upside of not having a job - you can't get fired for blogging at 3 in the afternoon. The downside is you can't get paid for it either.

This week, relatives of the Gipper, George Gipp, had his body exhumed for reasons which were not made public. Family representatives denied that they wanted to make sure that with Notre Dame's rough start this year, his body was not actually spinning in his grave. In more news, I brought you the story last week that Texas A&M coach Dennis Franchione admitted to giving a booster newletter inside info for a yearly membership fee. University officials said they will not fire the coach - yet - but are issuing him a "letter of admonishment." I'm guessing this whole thing wouldn't be such a problem if the Aggies hadn't lost to Miami by 17 last month and the fans weren't beginning to call for Franchione's job. Then again, what do I know about college football? I'm 12-18 this season.

This week's Maurice Clarett award goes to one of my favorite college football coaches ever - Joe Paterno. Joe Pa took a lot of heat this week after a story broke regarding a traffic incident with the grandfatherly head coach. According to Joe Pa on his radio show, he did not "flip out'' as previously reported by many media outlets, but he did confront a woman after she blew a stop sign near the State College campus this week. According to the coach, after blowing his horn at the offending car, the female driver stopped and he pulled up beside her. Paterno pointed his finger at the woman but assured fans and boosters, “I didn’t give her the finger.” Paterno went on to say, "I said, ‘Hey, don’t do that again because I took your license number,’ and I really hadn’t taken her license number. All of a sudden, somebody knocks on my window and I roll down the window and he says, ‘That’s my wife.’ And then I shouldn’t have said this, but I did; I said, ‘Well, that’s your problem.’” While the coach did not get out of his car, he said about 10 times a year he will stop a student driver on campus after the driver shows disregard for safety. The coach believes he was doing good.

I don't have too much to add here. Clearly this story got blown out of proportion. I always pictured Joe Pa as being more like the basketball ref named Whitey from Adam Sandler's "Eight Crazy Nights" than Walter Matthau from "Grumpy Old Men." I guess this only confirms that Joe Pa really is a do-gooder after all. He may still trail Bobby Bowden in all-time wins, but I'll bet he leads him in citizens arrests. Runners up this week - Mike Leach of Texas Tech who broke his arm when he fell off of his bike (yes he was sober), 100 LSU fans who bought "faux-ny" tickets to last week's game against the Gators, and Gator QB Tim Tebow who had so many threatening phone calls to his cell phone that he had to change his number. Rumor has it that LSU students were walking around campus with t-shirts printed with Tebow's number. I guess there's a reason the Tigers are number 1 - they sure have the fan support. On to the picks.

Home team in BOLD

Rutgers -15.5 Syracuse

I'm not sure what happened to Rutgers this season. After losing only two games last season, the Scarlet Knights have lost that many in the past two weeks. After falling from 10th to 21st, the boys representing the State University of New Jersey are now unranked. Even worse, Bon Jovi has yet to sell out their 10 shows at the Prudential Center this month. How much more disappointment can the Garden State handle? Syracuse, on the other hand, was picked apart by West Virginia last week in a game where the Mountaineers needed to show the world that their loss to South Florida was a one-time thing. This week, Rutgers looks to show the world that while they might not go 10-2 this year, they are better than their 3-2 record suggests. Ray Rice, who is third in the nation in rushing TDs, will look to exploit an Orange defense that has given up 19 rushing TDs this season. Even if they do manage to stop Rice, QB Mike Teel is averaging 300 yards and 2 TDs per game. Sorry, B, but Syracuse is not going to lose this by less than 3 scores. I'll take Rutgers giving the points.

VA Tech -12.5 Duke

Uh, this is the same Duke team that is 1-5 this season while scoring an average of 9 fewer points each week than they allow, right? And this is the same VA Tech team that is 5-1 and has only lost to LSU, right? I thought so. At least basketball season starts this weekend, which is a good thing for both Duke and Syracuse. I'll take VA Tech to beat the spread.

TCU - 6 Stanford

"The band is still on the field! The band is still on the field!" Can Stanford pull off two upsets in back-to -back weeks? I don't think so. On the other side of the field is a TCU squad that hasn't met expectations this season, and is currently sitting at 3-3. The Horned Frogs lost a tough one last week to Wyoming and are looking to right the ship this week. Tavita Prichard is getting the start this week for the Cardinal, and I have it on good authority that there is nothing that TCU hates more than QBs named Tavita. For TCU, they will be without DE Tommy Blake who will likely be out of football forever due to excessive stress. Not to make light of Blake's situation, but I've been without a paying job for the past 4+ months, I have rent, car insurance, and student loans to pay, and I don't have any great prospects on the horizons. Not to mention, I haven't had a solid bowel movement in a week. I'm just saying.
I'll take TCU giving 6.

Central Michigan -13 Army

MAC leader Central Michigan takes on Army this week, a week after the Black Knights came from behind and stunned Tulane 20-17 in overtime. I've never been a big fan of picking service academies to win games in which they're getting double digit points to a MAC team (okay so I can't think of this situation ever coming up before, but work with me here). However, this week seems different. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that Army is giving up less than 21 points per game, and CMU has won 2 of their three games in barn-burner fashion. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that the Chippewas' leading rusher is also their QB Dan LeFevour. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that Army looks invigorated after winning in dramatic fashion last week. Whatever the reason, I think Army is better than ND State, and the Bison beat CMU by 30. I'll take Army with the points.

UTEP -1 East Carolina

Has it really gotten so bad that I'm picking Conference USA games this week? It sure looks like it. Here's what I know about these two teams:
1) UTEP has played all but one of their games this season in the state of Texas.
2) UTEP is averaging 49.3 points per game in their last three wins.
3) The Miners have a running back named Marcus Thomas who has more rushing TDs per game (2.2) than all of Notre Dame's running backs (2) this season.

4) Even though ECU's colors are purple and gold, they are not the best team in the nation this season.
5) ECU's mascot is a Pirate. Seton Hall's mascot is also a Pirate. Unfortunately, Seton Hall doesn't have a football team. If they did, maybe I'd go to a college football game. Probably not though.
6) The university is ranked one of the "Best Value Colleges" by The Princeton Review in 2008. That doesn't have much to do with their football team, but at least it gives students more money to buy beer - which is a good thing I guess.
Sinced I really couldn't find much to say about their football team, I don't like ECU's chances here. I'll go with UTEP giving a point.

Until next week, enjoy the games and the ALCS (well, at least those of you who don't root for chokers).

Week 6 Results

Did I just go 2-8? Um, yup, it seems that way. Special thanks to UCLA for starting a walk-on QB against a hungry Notre Dame team, and Wisconsin for proving everyone but me right this week. At least Temple won. That should be worth like 20 points. But it isn't.

Season Record - 12-18.

Back to even

Once again, I'm at .500 (10-10) after going 3-2 last week. Since I missed a week, I'm picking a whopping 10 games this week. I'll give 5 the regular treatment, and try to fit in a witty one-liner for the rest. Let's hope this goes better for me than Chien-Ming Wang's start went for the Yankees in Game 1 of the ALDS. Yeah, I said it - get over it.


Mo' Clarett nominee of the week:

Dennis Franchione of Texas A&M was a close runner-up this week after announcing that he has stopped selling inside information on the Aggies to boosters in a newsletter (which by the way is $1200 per subscription). I'm not sure who these people are that would pay $1200 a year to learn whether or not a packup punter has a broken pinky finger or not, but then again, I went to a school without a football team. This week's nominee is Steve Budin, a Miami sports handicapper, who published a book claiming that the 1954 Oklahoma-Oklahoma State game was fixed by mobsters who "allegedly used a horse laxative to poison some of the Sooners' players." Riiiiiight. and the next thing you're gonna tell me is that there are NBA refs who blow their whistle more often in order to affect the outcome of games. I wasn't born yesterday you know. On to the games.

Home team in BOLD

Rutgers -4 Cincinnati

The Scarlet Knights' loss to Maryland last week shouldn't have been so surprising. Rutgers' three wins came against Navy, Buffalo, and Norfolk State - we're not exactly talking BCS teams here. Still, Maryland (and I hate to say this) is vastly underrated (we'll get to that later) at 3-2. Unfortunately for Rutgers, it doesn't get easier this week. Undefeated Cincy rolls into NJ looking to be the team in the Big East this year. Good luck to them. As laughable as the teams Rutgers beat may be, the five teams that have lost to the Bearcats are a combined 7-17 on the year. I fully expect Mike Teel and Ray Rice to have 2 TDs each and I really don't think that Cincy's QB Ben Mauk, a transfer from Wake Forest, will step it up against the Sacrlet Knight defense. Look for Rutgers to cover the spread and reclaim their spot atop the Big Easy . . . er . . . Big East.

Oklahoma -11.5 Texas (neutral site)

Oy vey. Who would have thought that after this game, one of these teams would be winless in the Big XII? Both teams are coming off of upset losses and are looking to exact a little revenge. Big questions for this game: Can Sam Bradford play well enough for Cheeques to justify his man-crush? Will Texas be able to get their special teams in order after giving up 2 punt returns for TDs? Has Colt McCoy fully recovered after throwing four picks and getting his bell rung last week? What kind of goodies will we see deep-fried at this year's Texas State Fair? The answers to all of this and more will be shown to us via the magic of television this Saturday! As for me, I think Sam Bradford and the Longhorns special teams will regain their form, I think Colt McCoy, despite having the best name for a QB, will have a shaky first half, and I'm looking forward to deep-fried cheeseburgers and pizza to clog my arteries. Screw you, Weight Watchers! I'm also going to say that unless Vince Young steps in for the slightly-concussed McCoy, Oklahoma will cover the spread.

UCLA -22 Notre Dame

I'm speechless. Seriously? 21 points here? My how the mighty have fallen. I have a buddy who loves the Irish and has no desire toeven watch this game. In fact, ABC may want to show Nancy Kerrigan's Haloween Skating Special instead. I'm not even sure Charlie Weis knows how to handle a 5 game losing streak. Even Michigan's ineligible player can't help the Irish win a game. Notre Dame has 2 rushing TDs, their QBs have more interceptions (5) than passing touchdowns (3), and they've only attempted four field goals this season (making just 2 of them). UCLA is 4-1, 3-0 in the PAC-10 (yes, they're in first place in USC's PAC-10) , and dismantled a Washington team that picked apart a Boise State team that has only lost one game out of their last 18. The key to this game will be quarterbacks. UCLA's are banged up, and Notre Dame's are just plain awful. On the other hand, Notre Dame can't go 0-6, can they? Unfortunately, yes, they can. And looking ahead on the schedule, they take on BC next week and then USC after that. Hey Charlie, maybe you guys should schedule Temple or Marshall next season - just a thought. UCLA covers the spread, and I might just buy the rights to www.fireweis.com myself.

GA Tech -3 Maryland

Maryland is coming off a big win at Rutgers, and is finally looking to show everyone that they are a force to be reckoned with. Unfortunately for them, they get the team that (in my opinion) is even more of a sleeper than they are - Georgia Tech. Here are the facts - the Yellowjackets have lost twice, to a VERY good BC Team (we'll see them in the Orange Bowl) and a surprising Virginia team. Yes, GA Tech has only one passing TD this season, but they have 15 on the ground (and Maryland has given up an average of 204 yards rushing and 2.3 TDs per game over their last three). Sorry, Terps, but Tashard Choice and Jonathan Dwyer are going to have a field day with you guys. I'm taking GA Tech to cover the spread.

Illinois -2 Wisconsin

As overrated as everyone thinks the Big Ten is, I'm not sure I agree with this line. Badger QB Tyler Donovan and RB P.J. Hill each have 9TDs on the year. Yes, those combined 18 scores came against the likes of Washington State and the Citadel, but you still have to be impressed. On the other side of the field, the Illini are looking to finish off Wisconsin, something they couldn't do last year as the Badger rallied for 18 points to win in Madison. This time, the games moves to Champaign, and every week, the Badgers look like they're on the brink of losing their first game. However, I think Wisconsin's defense will regroup and have enough to handle Illinois QB Juice Williams (who may have the second best name for a QB in college football). I'll take Wisconsin with the points.

The other five games . . .

Ohio State -7 Purdue - Welcome back to earth, Purdue. Congrats, you beat Notre Dame (who hasn't?) but you've never faced a team like OSU that features not one, but two running backs named Wells! I'll take the Buckeyes to cover.

Texas A&M -5.5 Oklahoma State

How cool is this? The second tier teams from each state are playing against each other too! Somehow, I don't think this one gets the same attention as the Red River Shootout. I'll go with the Aggies to cover.

USF -16 FAU

Wait, when did Florida Atlantic get good? This is the same team that went 2-9 in 2005, right? They're 3-2? Why wasn't I aware of this? This changes everything. Well, not really. FAU lost to ranked Kentucky last week, and I don't see them beating a ranked team this week. South Florida is creeping up the rankings, and should be the Big East BCS representative in January. I'll take the Bulls over the Owls.

Northern Illinois -4 Temple

This could be the week for the Owls. I'm taking Temple with the points. Seriously. Stop laughing.

Virginia -10.5 Middle Tenn

There is no way Virginia wins by less than 11 points. 1-4 MTSU has beaten Florida International this season. I guess they have one more win than Notre Dame . . . which is nice. Unfortunately, Virginia is 4-1 and boasts a big win over GA Tech. Their other three wins, not so impressive. However, I still like their chances over the Blue Raiders. I'll take Virginia giving the points.

That's it for this week - until then . . .

Week 5, back with a vengence

After I missed a week, I'm ready to pick some real winners (so I hope). I apologize for a lack of humor - I'm working on three hours of sleep while working a pretty big conference for some of the biggest movers and shakers in the world. In fact, this afternoon I peed next to Usher. True story. I half expected Little John to pop out of the stall screaming, "YEAAAAAAAAH!" At least he washed his hands. I'd be disappointed if he hadn't washed his hands.

By the way - I just learned that I'll be writing language to recognize Dikembe Mutombo's efforts to help eradicate neglected tropical diseases (don't ask, I don't know why they're neglected either). It reminded me of a story I heard about him that every time he walked into a bar or a party while at Georgetown, he yelled, "Who wants to sex the Mutombo?!" I'm hoping to meet him and ask him if it ever worked. I'm guessing that won't happen. Hopefully I'll have more amusing celeb stories next week. Rumor has it I have to write stuff for Shakira tomorrow.

Mo Clarett nominee - So many to choose from this week, we'll go with Antonio Henton of Ohio State who was arrested on charges of soliciting a prostitute. Just when you thought the Buckeyes had the upper hand in taunting Michigan for losing to App State, Big Blue can counter with this. Henton, who is a third string QB, had little to say in court when arraigned this week. The judge, on the other hand, remarked that, "Your head is hung down and you're looking extremely sad." No kidding - you'd be sad too if you blew money on a hooker and didn't even get a handy out of it.

On to the picks . . .

Home team in BOLD

West Virginia -7 South Florida

After upsetting the Mountaineers on their home turf last year, everyone is wondering if this year's Big East Cinderella can repeat at home this week. Unfortunately, there are fewer things worse than a West Virginian seeking revenge - just ask Eliza Dusku and Emmanuelle Chriqui.
That being said, South Florida may have some momentum after upsetting Auburn and dismantling North Carolina this season. The Bulls highly-touted QB Matt Grothe has yet to throw an INT, and has passed for 200+ yards in 2 of his 3 games. However, Grothe will have to shoulder the majority of the scoring unless South Florida can find a way to stop the 1-2 combo of Steve Slaton (9TDs) and Pat White (6TDs), something no team has been able to do this season. I don't think South Florida can repeat history and I'll take West Virginia giving 7.


LSU -39.5 Tulane


This game is a big "numbers" game. LSU has forced nine interceptions in four games this year, including an incredible 6 against Mississippi State. Tulane QB Scott Elliott has a 4:1 INT to TD ratio this year and comes into the game with a QB rating of 84.34. LSU is still looking to steal 1st place votes from USC, and the Trojans will have their hands full trying to contain Washington's do-it-all QB Jake Locker. The Bayou Bengals are 16th in the nation in scoring (41.3 ppg), but are giving up a paltry 5.8 per game (which is skewed by the 16 that SC scored on them last week). This in state rivalry is barely a rivalry, with LSU winning the last 15 games they played against each other. A rivalry where one team wins 15 more times than the other? Most Red Sox fans seem to think so. I don't, and I also don't think the Green Wave stands a chance against the Tigers. LSU covers here giving the points.

Since I'm short on time, here are my three final picks:

USC -20.5 @ Washington - This is Ty's time to show Notre Dame that they might have made a long-term mistake. I'll take Washington with the points.


Hawaii -25.5 @ Idaho - Ho hum. Just another road trip for the best passing game in the land. Colt Brennan should have no trouble beating this spread. In the first half. I'll take the Rainbow Warriors giving 3+ TDs.

Clemson -3 @ GA Tech - I'm still not sure when the Yellowjackets will get the respect they deserve. Maybe beating Clemson will get them noticed. I hope so. I'm taking GA Tech getting three points.

Until next week . . .

Off for the Holiday

After going 2-3, I took a week off to repent for some stupid picks. Back later today for the week of 9/29.

Two Teams Enter, One Teams Leave (without a win)

Ok, I've racked my brain for a joke about the once mighty Notre Dame taking on the once mighty Michigan and frankly, I can't think of one. Let's just take a look at their season stats:





Notre Dame - Average rushing yards per game, -4; Total points allowed, 64; Offensive TDs, 0.


Michigan - Home Record, 0-2; Total points allowed, 73; QB rating of this week's starter, 47.7.





I'm not sure if I should laugh or cry . . . wait, who am I kidding, this is hilarious! Syracuse has more rushing yards per game (6) than the Irish. Temple has allowed fewer points (72) than Michigan. I'm sure ABC loves the fact that they scored the TV rights to this game. On second thought, with the nation's eyes turned to see if Big Blue can go 0-3 at the Big House, this might be their highest rated game of the season.





Maurice Clarett nominee:





I was sent a story this week about a Texas fan that wore a Longhorns shirt into a Sooners bar and nearly lost his testicles. I'd make a joke about having the balls to wear a Texas shirt in OU territory, but that's too easy. Instead I'll site this as proof that Texas fans actually do have testicles. Who knew?





This week's actual nominee is tough to pick. It was a relatively quiet one for college football players, so we're going to nominate Dean Bresciani, vice president for student affairs at Texas A & M. The Aggies, who have a six-year old collie named Reveille as their highest-ranking member of the school's Corps of Cadets, quarantined the mascot after she snapped at her handler when he stepped on the collie's tail while running. Imagine that, a dog snapped at someone when he stepped on her tail! Next thing you know the Aggies are going to penalize Reveille for not scooping her own poop.





On to the picks . . .





Home team in bold





Wake Forest -21.5 Army





Yes, I know the Deacons are the home team, and Army is a service academy, but a 21 1/2 point spread? Let's take a look at the facts:


Fact 1 - Brett Hodges (last week's starter) and Riley Skinner (week 1 starter) have similar numbers. Each has 1 TD, 3 INT, and 28 (Hodges) or 29 (Skinner) completions. Not fantastic stats for either guy.


Fact 2 - Skinner did not play last week due to a separated shoulder, and Hodges has started exactly one career game (last week against Nebraska).


Fact 3 - Army is allowing a modest 149.5 yards passing per game.


Fact 4 - Army has played Akron and URI and is 1-1.





Hmmm, maybe a 21.5 point spread is justified after all. Something about this game doesn't sit right with me. Maybe its because both teams have the same colors. Yeah, that must be it. Either way, I don't see this one being close. Wake Forest is a lot better than their 0-2 record suggests, and Army's win came against URI in overtime last week, so they are still 0-7 in their last 7 games against FBS opponents. Sorry, Black Knights, it's back to your losing ways this week. Look for Wake Forest to take out some frustration after that 4th quarter INT in the end zone last week. I'll take Wake Forest to cover the spread against Army.





GA Tech -7 Boston College





Both teams are 2-0 and come into this game off big wins last week. The Jackets whupped Samford [and son] 69-14, and BC held NC State to 56 yards rushing and forced 5 INTs. GA Tech prides themselves on their running game, racking up an astounding 327 yards per game. Is it a case of the unstoppable force meets the immovable object? Not really. However, I think that GA Tech finally will have their hands full with a quality opponent this week (no offense to Samford, but we know Notre Dame isn't going to a bowl game this year). If Eagles QB Matt Ryan (275 passing yards per game, 6 passing TDs) is on his game this week, coupled with another solid game from RB Andre Callender (6.5 yards per carry, 2 TDs) GA Tech could finally be tested. Frankly, I like BC's chances even if they are on the road. I'll take the Eagles with the points.





TCU -8 Air Force





There is something to be said when your leading passer (Shaun Carney, 232 yards) is also your leading rusher (163 yards). On the other side of the field, over-hyped TCU dropped a big one to Texas last week (43-13) after manhandling Baylor in week 1 (27-0). Just how bad were the Horned Frogs last week? After being ranked No. 2 in the country in rush defense in 2006 (61 yards per game) and holding Baylor to 51 yards on the ground, they gave up 176 to Texas while being held to 43. Consider that a free lesson from Mack Brown on how to stop the run. Air Force, historically a passing team, has more than twice as many total yards passing (613) as they do rushing (232). While this bodes well for the Falcons, TCU also features a secondary that has 6 INTs this year. As difficult as it is for me to overlook the Texas game, I think TCU is better than their record shows, and will likely end the season in the top 20. I'll take the Horned Frogs to cover the spread.





Michigan -7 Notre Dame





Can Michigan really lose three straight games at the Big House? Can Charlie Weis really open the season at 0-3? The answer to one of these questions is yes.





The story lines to this game are fantastic. Mike Hart guaranteeing a win for Big Blue. Chad Henne seemingly out for the game. Charlie Weis threatening to go on an eating binge if the Irish lose again. The entire city of Ann Arbor on suicide watch. Seriously, after watching Michigan's loss to Oregon, I don't think I've seen a group of more forlorn looking fans in my life (and coming from a Red Sox fan, that says a lot). I really don't know how to break this game down. Notre Dame clearly needs help on offense. I'm not sold on either Evan Sharpley (sacked 7 times v. GA Tech) or Jimmy Clausen (sacked 7 times v. Penn State). The good news for Notre Dame is that Brady Quinn might start this weekend. The bad news is that it's for the Browns. Michigan looks to Freshman Ryan Mallet who completed a whopping 35% of his passes after coming in for the injured Henne last week.

I know someone has to win this game, and with Michigan favored at home by 7, I can't imagine that they'll lose. However, Mike Hart has been their offensive source, and after being scoring 3 TD's against App. State, he was blanked by Oregon. I don't know what he'll do against a rush defense that has given up an average of 215 yards per game. Whatever it is, I think it will be enough for Michigan to win and cover the spread. At 0-3, maybe it will enough for Irish fans to register www.fireweis.com. I think Bob Davie is available.

USC -9.5 Nebraska

AP voters are looking for a reason to drop USC to number 2 and boost LSU to number 1. This week, the Trojans take on the red-hot Huskers in Nebraska, where they are 13-3 since 2005. USC has only lost 4 regular season games since 2002, and you guessed it, all four games were on the road. Now I'm not one to make my picks based on trends (I took Oklahoma over Miami last week based on the strength of their Redneck Tea), but Lincoln is a tough place for any team to play, let alone one coming off a shaky win in week 1 and a bye in week 2. USC just isn't the same powerhouse that they used to be, and in case you missed it, Nebraska has gone 17-9 over the last two seasons under Coach Bill Callahan. However, Callahan has never beaten a team ranked higher than 23, and USC is a far cry from the Texas A&M squad Nebraska eeked out a win against last year, or the Iowa State team they beat in 2005. Bottom line, USC is going to have to prove their number 1 ranking this week, or risk losing it - even if they win. At #14, Nebraska hasn't been ranked this high since starting the season 6-1 in 2003. I have a feeling that this year's Nebraska team is more than just Lucky. In fact, I think Nebraska will win this game outright. I'm picking the upset here, and taking the Huskers to beat USC (with or without the points).

Until next week . . .

Week 2 Results

Thanks to Washington's convincing upset (hello top 25?) of Boise State, I went 4-1 last week, bringing my season record back to a ho-hum .500.

Coming this week, Notre Dame! Michigan! Somebody HAS to win! Only on NBC!

Week 2, and wondering where I can buy stock in Appalachain State t-shirts

After a poor showing in week 1, I think I've gotten this losing business out of my system. Notre Dame and Michigan might need another week or so to recover. For those of you living in a box, Big Blue was upset by Appalachain State. Not to take anything away from ASU, but they have won the I-AA championship two years in a row, so its not like Michigan lost to D-I dormats UNLV (hi there, Utah State) or New Mexico State (what's up, SE Louisiana?). Speaking of big losers . . . its time for this week's Maurice Clarett nominee:

Ryan Broyles, Oklahoma - As I've said in the past, I don't normally pick on guys arrested for theft, but as always, this arrest had a twist. Broyles, a freshman second team WR, was charged with petty larceny this week after using a key to turn the meter off at a Mr. Shortstop convenience store gas pump and steal gas. Somehow Broyles, who was not an employee of Mr. Shortstop, obtained the key and codes to the pump in order to get free gas after the store had closed for the evening. My favorite part of this story is the fact that the owner of the store is former Norman, Oklahoma mayor Ron Henderson. Henderson was puzzled when he heard about the theft. "We've been experiencing shortages for several months and we've been trying to figure out where the problem might be," Henderson said. "We thought maybe we're losing gas in the tanks or in the underground lines. Never once did we dream it could be theft related."
Henderson said he is unsure how anyone could get a key because neither he nor his employees have one. He also said he doesn't know whether the alleged attempt was an isolated incident.
Uh, Mr. Mayor? You just got finished telling us that you've been losing gas for months and you're wondering if this is an isolated incident? No, I'm sure the two have nothing to do with each other. That and Rhett Bomar called; your rental car is ready to be picked up.

On to the picks . . .

Home teams in BOLD

Penn State -17 Notre Dame

Remember last week when I said I'd wait until the Irish were favored by a touchdown or more? I could be waiting all season at this point. Charlie Weis could bring Aretha Franklin in to the locker room to sing about R-E-S-P-E-C-T, and it wouldn't matter. Since the Evan Sharpley experiment worked so well last week, Notre Dame will start the surgically repaired Jimmy Clausen in Happy Valley. I don't think even Brady Quinn could help the Irish against the Penn State D. Maybe Tom Zbikowski should have stuck to his boxing career. I like Joe Pa's Nittany Lions to exact some revenge after last year's Irish blowout of Penn State. I'll take PSU to cover the spread.

Boise State -3 Washington

Last week, America's favorite cheerleader-marrying running back rushed for 128 yards and three TD's. Ian Johnson probably won't put up those numbers this week, but you can expect some sort of trickery on the part of Boise State as they play what looks to be their toughest game of the year (until the match up with Hawaii) against Washington. I'm not sold on the Huskies who beat up on the Orangemen of Syracuse 42-12 last week. Redshirt freshman QB Jake Locker didn't pass for any TS's last week, but he did rush for two of them. This is the type of performance that makes you wonder if he is one of those scrambling QB's that jut runs all over the backfield until he decides to take it in himself. Someone should call the ASPCA to check if he owns any property in Virginia. On the other hand, I am sure of two things: 1) Ian Johnson is from San Dimas, CA, and 2) San Dimas High football rules! I'll take Boise State to cover the spread.

Oklahoma -10.5 Miami (FL)

I'm beginning to wonder if Ryan Broyles (see above) got arrested just to intimidate the 'Canes this week. "See Miami, we have tough guys who steal gas and have shady part time jobs in Norman. You'd better come prepared!" I've been to Norman, and I've been to Miami. I can honestly say this: Norman has a lot fewer old Jewish women. That, and they have this drink called Redneck Tea that you drink out of a Mason Jar. Miami just has frilly cocktails and Top Chef reruns. For those reasons alone, I'm taking the Sooners to beat the spread.

Auburn -7 USF

After a lackluster showing by USF last week against Elon, and a comeback win by Auburn (including 2 TDs in the 4th quarter) over K-State, neither of these hyped teams is looking particularly strong. To complicate matters, Auburn suspended RB Brad Lester, who led the team with 9 rushing TDs last season. USF features QB Matt Grothe and . . . uh yeah, that's kind of it. My point is, neither of these teams are especially fantastic (though the Bulls are the dark horse pick in the Big East) but USF does have a penchant for pulling off the big upset on the road (just ask West Virginia). For some reason, I like the Bulls to make it close here. I'll take USF with the points.

West Virginia -24 Marshall

Marshall has lost all 6 games they've played against the Mountaineers. That's not a good track record. Last year, WVU walloped the not-so-Thundering hurd 42-10, with RB Steve Slaton putting up 203 yards. Last week, Marshall scored a whopping 3 points against Miami giving up 250+ yards. This isn't a good sign either. I'm really looking for something nice to say about Marshall's chances, but I can't besides the fact that they have a RB named Chubb Small, and their fans are notoriously unforgiving towards visiting teams. Even the Huntington crowd won't rattle the 1-2 combo of Steve Slaton and Pat White. I'm gonna go out on a limb and take West Virginia giving 24 points here. Shame on all of you for wondering where the "sleeping with their sisters" line was in this game. Just because there are two teams from West Virginia involved, it doesn't mean you'll get an incest joke. Now a joke about the combined number of teeth in the stadium this week doubling as the over/under is a different story.

Until next week . . .

Results of Week 1

Yeah, I went 1-4. Thanks to Hawaii for only playing Brennan in the first half, as well as giving up a fourth quarter TD to cut the lead to 56.

I hope to get back on track this week, as key games include VA Tech - LSU, Oklahoma - Miami, and the artist-formerly-known-as-Michigan takes on the always well-dressed Oregon Ducks.

My local supermarket is out of Ramen Noodles - this can only mean one thing . . .

Yes, friends, it is that time of year again. A time when car sales in Oklahoma go down, a time when underclassmen at Notre Dame have to look elsewhere for someone to get them beer, a time when Miami students cringe when they see their housing assignment is on the 7th Floor. That's right; it's time for college football season to begin!

This year's offseason brought us enough stories to fill three episodes of Cops - and that was just from South Carolina. Likely out for this week's opener against Louisiana-Lafayette is safety Emmanuel Cook. Cook's absence this week is explained by his recent appendectomy, not his arrest on a gun charge. Cook was reinstated this week by school officials and the Ole Ball Coach decided it was a case of Cook "being in the wrong place at the wrong time." I'm gonna have to try that one with my girlfriend. "No - I'm working on my cover letters, I swear. What? This X-Box controller? Oh I don't know how it got there. It must be that I was in the wrong place at the wrong time." Yeah - that sounds like a solid alibi. Who wrote Cook's defense statement, Miss Teen South Carolina?

In other Gamecocks news, QB Blake Mitchell, tailback Bobby Wallace and cornerback Chris Hail were all suspended for one game due to "excessive absences during summer school classes." Okay, I know I wasn't one of the jocks in college, and I managed to graduate in four years with a B-ish average, but there was one summer I took a couple of summer school classes to avoid having to sit through Economics with a particularly tough professor. As much as I'd like to slam these guys for missing summer school classes (where you generally get a C just for showing up - kind of like grad school!), there were a few times I missed class because the weather was nice, or I just didn't feel like sitting in a hot classroom for two hours. On the other hand, because of Mitchell's suspension, Coach Steve Spurrier has said redshirt freshman Chris Smelley will get the start. So thank you Blake Mitchell, for giving me the opportunity to make at least one "Smelley" joke this season.

In case you were wondering, the pre-season nominees for the Maurice Clarett Award, given annually to the college football player who does the dumbest thing over the course of the season are as follows:

Darrell "Aloha Mr." Hand, Notre Dame: Hand was arrested for soliciting a prostitute at a South Bend McDonalds. I've been to this McDonalds and, uh, I guess the suggestively clad women at the drive through weren't Sisters from the College of the Holy Cross. Who knew?

Woody George, USF: George was arrested by campus police after it was discovered he not only removed the boot on his car, but threw it away as well. Because the boot is valued at $450, Woody's "unlawful disposal" is considered felony grand theft. If he can recover the boot and bring it back to Public Safety, charges will likely be dropped. Even if they're not, it is unlikely that George will be missed this week in South Florida's opener against the football powerhouse that is Elon.

Blake Powers, Indiana: Not so much a stupid arrest as plain dumb luck, Powers was nabbed for hitting an off-duty police officer's car with a water balloon. Apparently, while stopped at a traffic light, Blake tossed a water balloon out of a car he was riding in with some buddies . . . and managed to hit the police officer in the head. Paul Wampler, an Indiana University police officer, had just gotten off work and was heading home. Wampler was in uniform in his personal vehicle and followed the other vehicle to a residence where Powers admitted throwing the water balloon. The occupants said they had not realized the person in the other car was a police officer. I'm looking for Powers to get some snaps at QB this season - he definitely has the accuracy.

and last but not least . . .

LaTerryal Savoy, Michigan: The Michigan WR was arrested in July (one of six players to be arrested since March) on charges that he exposed himself July 23 to a 21-year-old woman he knew inside Michigan Stadium. Though my self-defined criteria for the Clarett award clearly excuse most minor burglary and assault charges (unless there is a really funny story to go along with them) I'll make an exception in this case. Savoy's lawyer explained the situation and has cleared his client of any wrongdoing. According to attorney Nicholas Roumel, Savoy turned to say hello to a woman and had forgotten to zip his pants, a case of "accidental exposure." Roumel then went on to explain that Savoy is a huge fan of the movie Scarface, and greets everyone with Tony Montana's timeless quote, "Say hello to my little friend!"




on to the picks . . .






The first week of the season always has some tune-up games. #10 Louisville takes on Murray State who went 1-10 last season and fields only 14 upperclassmen this season. Said Coach Matt Griffin, "That's how we do it, that's the way we do things. We recruit and develop, recruit and develop. It's a little scary that we're actually younger than we were last year, but the sky is the limit for these kids athletically." Yes, coach, the sky really is the limit when you don't have much farther to fall. Along with these lopsided matchups come some crazy point spreads - the Cardinals are favored by an astounding 8 touchdowns over the Racers. I've decided that despite these daunting spreads, it is much easier to come back from a 0-5 week early on than it is right before the bowl games, so I'll be picking five games with spreads of 21 or more this week. Really, there's nothing quite as exciting as hoping that the backup QB decides he wants to get his first career TD with five minutes left in the fourth quarter to ensuring that the favorite the spread. Just as long as Toledo isn't involved, I think this week will work out just fine.




On a side note, I think Notre Dame is an overrated 2.5 point favorite this week over GA Tech, but I'd rather wait until they're favored by at least a touchdown to jump on the "Irish are overrated" bandwagon.

Home team in bold. Odds (when available) come from DannySheridan.com




Buffalo +31 Rutgers, the State University of New Jersey - New Brunswick

Rutgers begins the season ranked #16, still riding high from last year's 11-2 season. Buffalo starts the year excited that Temple has joined the MAC, giving the Bulls someone to battle for last place in the conference. Clearly the advantage lies with the Scarlet Knights who also have the momentum of Bon Jovi's new album hitting #1 on the Billboard charts working for them too. I'll take Ray Rice and the Knights to cover.



Idaho +44.5 USC


Trojans RB Chauncy Washington is out this week with a sprained right shoulder, and Emmanuel Moody has transferred to Florida (shhhhh, don't tell anyone). Whatever will Pete Carroll do? He only has another eight running backs and three full backs to choose from! Offensive coordinator Steve Sarkasian breaks down USC's other options. All of these are actual quotes taken from an interview with ESPN.

On Stafon Johnson - "He didn't know how to practice. He came in and he just did not know how to practice."



On CJ Gable - "He's eating better."


On Hershel Davis - "He is not the most talented . . . but he can play."



Uh, on second thought, maybe USC does have a problem here. Unfortunately for the Vandals, the biggest offensive display to come out of Idaho lately took place in a men's room at the airport in Minneapolis (za-zing!). I'll take USC to cover the spread in what looks to be John David Booty's early Heisman resume builder.













Temple + 21 Navy


Hi Temple, welcome to the MAC! Now instead of fighting to be the worst team without a conference, you can fight to be the worst team with a conference. Congrats! Temple ended the 2006 season with a 42-6 loss to (you guessed it) Navy. The Midshipmen return a QB with the best name in college football, Kaipo-Noa Kaheaku-Enhada as well as Reggie Campbell, a good running back who had 950 all-purpose yards last year. Navy should have no trouble building on last year's 9-4 season (which ended in a tough 25-24 loss to BC in the Meineke Car Care Bowl). I like Navy on the road to cover the spread.



East Carolina + 24 VA Tech



Virginia Tech is the sentimental favorite this week with the Hokies having their first football game since tragedy hit the campus in April. All eyes will be on Blacksburg this weekend as the greater VA Tech community remembers the 32 students killed and rallies around the #9 team in the country. ECU will be coming into the season with a new QB and a new punter, which could mean a long day for the Pirates' defense. On the other side of the ball, Hokie QB Sean Glennon looks to better his 1:1 TD to interception ration from last year, and he'll have his top two targets in Eddie Royal and Josh Morgan returning for their senior season. If you were skimming this paragraph looking for a Michael Vick joke, you won't find it. I think its better to let sleeping dogs lie. I'll take VA Tech to cover.



Northern Colorado +59.5 Hawaii



Yes, you read that right. Hawaii is favored by fifty-nine and a half points. The Warriors' high-powered offense is led by Heisman dark-horse candidate Colt Brennan who set a single-season record last year by completing 58 touchdown passes. Brennan, who famously(?) led the Saddleback Community College Gauchos to a Mission Conference title in 2004, looks to do the same with Hawaii this year in the WAC. For Northern Colorado, the only thing more embarrassing than their off-field punter drama was their 1-10 on the field performance last season. How bad were the Bears? They were outscored by their opponents by an average of 22 points per game, including giving up a total of 107 points in their last two games. Is it possible that Brennan will use this opportunity to try and break David Klingler's single game record of 11 TDs in a game? If a game featuring a top 25 team begins at midnight, will anyone watch? I think the answer to both of these questions is a resounding "yes." In what may be the biggest rout ever, I see Hawaii covering the spread and Brennan passing for a personal high 8+ TDs and 600+ yards.







Look for another update Thursday-ish of next week. Until then . . .