Week 13

Last Week - 3-2
This Season - 28-31-1

Happy Turkey Day!

Since I started a new job this week, and it is Thanksgiving, I'm serving up an abbreviated version of the picks this week. By the way, my apologies to the Ithaca Bombers who were trounced by the Purple Raiders last week, 42-18. Next up for Mount Union, Ewing, New Jersey's own College of New Jersey Lions! Try to contain your excitement.

Maurice Clarett nominee: Manch-vegas' own Jesse M.

No, he doesn't play college football, and since he's a "public figure" in the Granite State, I won't give his full name, but it rhymes with Artineau. In honor of Jesse's wedding tomorrow, he has won the award this week. Real smart, Jesse, one vagina for the rest of your life.

Seriously, I'm sorry I couldn't make it, but congrats to Jess and Kim on their wedding. I'm sure the two of you will be very happy, as long as the Red Sox keep winning. Kim, just know that in college Jesse had promised to name his first born after his favorite Red Sox if they ever won the World Series. I'm looking forward to meeting Oil Can Martineau someday.

On to the picks . . .

Home team in BOLD

Hawaii -3.5 Boise State

With a win, Hawaii can almost guarantee a spot in a BCS bowl game. While there is no chance that the Warriors will leapfrog the PAC 10 winner, Big XII winner, and/or LSU to make it to Nawlins, there is a shot that Colt Brennan can revive his Heisman hopes. Standing in his way are the Kings of the Trick Play (sorry OU fans, I know you're still crying after last week's upset - I told you so). The Broncos are 10-1 and are averaging 44+ points per game this year. Hawaii narrowly escaped an upset last week at Nevada, and is two wins away from doing what Boise State did last year. Lets just hope that the BCS computer has ESPN2. Otherwise, the winner of this game could be relegated to the Humanitarian Bowl. Yay, Idaho! Hawaii covers the spread in this shootout.

Colorado -4.5 Nebraska

I'm sure that Bill Callahan would like nothing more than to end his coaching career at Nebraska with a win over rival Colorado. What, Callahan hasn't been fired yet? Tom Osborne, what were you hired for? Pull the trigger already! The only person from Nebraska having a worse year than Callahan is Gerald Ford - and he's dead. I'm not sure that President Ford could do a worse job coaching the Huskers either. For Colorado, they're a win away from being bowl eligible one season after going 2-12. And they did it without the help of Colt Brennan, a female kicker, or strippers! See, Notre Dame, there's hope for you after all. Colorado covers the spread this week.


Oregon -2 UCLA

This game makes me nervous. I hate taking a shaky road favorite, but I can't believe that the Ducks will lose two straight weeks even without the arm/legs of Dennis Dixon. They're really making the best of the situation, too. "The national championship thing was fine while it lasted," Oregon coach Mike Bellotti said. "The reality is we're still always trying to get the conference championship and the very best bowl game (the Rose Bowl)." Sure coach - I'm sure the mood in the locker room after last week's loss was all (pardon the pun) Roses. Let's put this game in perspective. Oregon is still 9th in the country and UCLA lost to Notre Dame. That alone should seal it up for most people. However, Oregon and UCLA give up roughly the
same number of points per game, and without Dennis Dixon, I don't think Oregon has enough firepower to come out on top. I'm taking UCLA with the points.

Texas -5 Texas A&M

I got an email from Dennis Franchione saying that they have no way to stop Colt McCoy. I subscribe to his super-secret booster club newsletter. That's why I'm going with the Longhorns to cover the spread.

VA Tech -3.5 Virginia

Could this be the year that Al Groh beats the Hokies? Does either team have a chance against Matt Ryan and BC for the ACC title? Does anybody really care about ACC Football now that basketball season started? VA Tech showed that they can hang with the ACC Atlantic champion Eagles for 58 minutes. Virginia hasn't had the pleasure of facing BC yet. After last week's drubbing of Miami, I think the Cavaliers are still the team to beat, and they'll prove that they are every bit as hot as I say they are against the Hokies in Charlottesville this week. Or, they'll lose miserably and I'll be forced to find a new "best team in the East." I'm taking Virginia with the points. I hope.

Until next week . . .